Rainstorm
by TheNexusDragon
Summary: Railan, the male human mage, and his relationship with his fellow Warden Alistair as they seek to end the blight. Warnings: Slight AU, M/M, and rated for future chapters.
1. Ostegar

Dragon Age belongs to Bioware, I just play with the characters they create.

* * *

Alistair rubbed his eyes as he entered the tent. Most of the others were asleep already and he was just as ready to sleep. He wished the Revered Mother would finally realize that he was a Grey Warden and not her personal message boy. It had been a long day and he would be glad to take off his soaked clothes and be dry for the first time today. That was the thing about Ostegar it never seemed to dry ever and now it was raining which was only making things worse. His boots still carried the mud from the Kokari Wilds from the morning and then they had done the joining. It had been the first he had seen since his own, and he was at least grateful there had been one who survived even if it was a mage.

Truly, he had nothing against the mage, but most mages just tended not to like him because of his training. Railan on the other hand did not seem to mind or he was good at hiding what he was feeling, Alistair was not certain either way. Having never been to the tower he really was not certain what motivated mages.

As he neared his bedroll, he heard an odd sound and stopped to try to identify it. He began to realize that the sound was coming from where the mage was sleeping curled up in a thin blanket on the bedroll next to his. Alistair looked down at the poor mage, the man must be freezing, he thought as he neared and noticed the other man shaking. The sound he had heard had been Railan's teeth chattering.

Alistair turned and went to the nearest trunk. It squealed as he opened it, the humid climate already rusting the hinges of the trunk. He grabbed two blankets and went back to the shivering mage. He unfolded one blanket and eased it down on to the man trying not to wake him. Alistair was surprised that Railan could even sleep with as cold as he was.

Alistair frowned as he noticed that the chattering sound stopped but Railan continued to shake. Maybe he is ill, Alistair mused to himself. He would have to check with Duncan in the morning. The mage may be of little use to them the coming day if he was sick. It could be possible that the younger man was having a delayed adverse reaction to the joining. Alistair had never heard of that but then again he had only been a Grey Warden for a little over six months and there was so much that he did not know yet.

Alistair wondered to himself why he was so concerned with the well-being of this one mage. Sure, the red haired mage had been the only to survive the joining this first time but there was just something that he could not place that made him so protective of this man. He shrugged and dismissed the confusion as lack of sleep and moved to continue trying to help the mage.

He unfolded the other blanked and draped it across the mage. The extra layer did little to stop the shivering. Worried Alistair began to wonder if he should wake Duncan to see if the mage was all right. He shook his head and remembered that this was his charge and he should be able to take care of one little mage.

Quickly he changed out of his armor. He lay down next to the other man and pulled his blanked over both of them. He rolled closer to the mage using his body heat to help warm him. He truly hoped he would wake early enough that the others would not see him like this, if they did, he would be in for some teasing. As he settled, he noticed that Railan had stopped shaking. The last thing Alistair thought before sleep took him was how the mage smelled just like the storm that was brewing outside the tent.

* * *

Railan woke with a start and blinked his eyes; it took him some time to remember where he was. He knew eventually he would have to get used to the fact that he was not in the tower any more. Waking up was always the hardest, part of him kept thinking that this was a dream and that he was still in the tower. As he reminded himself, he was a Grey Warden now and in Ostegar, something began to bother him.

It took him some time to figure out what was out of place but it suddenly occurred to him that there was a hand on his side and hot breath at his neck. His eyes went wide as the thoughts flooded through him. I am not in the tower, he thought, but waking up like this was not unusual in the tower. Oh, by the maker what happened, I cannot remember doing anything. Last thing I remember was falling asleep cold and alone.

Railan squeezed his eyes shut and took a couple of breaths to try to calm himself, but the panicky feeling of not remembering shook him. The other person stirred rolling away from him taking the top most blanket as he moved. Railan calmed a little as he noticed that there were still three blankets on him, and that they had been between him and the other.

Slowly he turned his head to look over his shoulder at who had slept next to him. He frowned when he noticed the blonde haired man and realized it had been the almost templar who had been spooning him.

Quietly he pulled on his robe and grabbed his staff. Before he left, he put one of the extra blankets over Alistair. Then folded the others and left them on the bedroll. With one last look at the sleeping templar, he left the tent.

As Railan stepped out of the tent, he realized he was not certain what he was supposed to do. He knew there would be preparations for the battle that was to take place but he had yet to be told how he fit into all that.

"Ah, good morning Railan," Duncan greeted him politely.

Railan could hear stifled laughter from nearby and could only guess that it was because of the situation he had woken up in. Railan nodded and spoke softly trying to stay out of trouble, "Good morning Duncan."

"Now that you are awake, you should have something to eat," Duncan handed him a bowl of grey porridge, "and then we have been requested to meet the king at the war council."

"Thank you," Railan mumbled and took the grey slop. Now that he was a Warden, he would have to ask if he could prepare some of the meals. He had enjoyed cooking at the tower and it may be a nice way for him to feel useful.

He found he was hungry enough that he did not even mind the bland food, and at least it was hot warming him from the inside out. When he was done eating, he looked up and noticed Duncan watching him.

"You may have more if you would like," Duncan said indicating the pot over the fire.

Railan knew he should have felt full and normally he would have but today he was hungry, but he was not about to eat more of the grey food. Maybe, he thought, it is this place it seems to suck the color out of everything.

"No, I am alright," he said with the shake of his head. Either way he was not certain he wanted to still be so close to the tent when the young templar awoke. "We probably should not keep the king waiting."

Duncan nodded and led the way to the war council meeting.

* * *

Slowly Alistair became aware that he was cold. He knew that he had been warm most of the night while he slept, and it had been the best sleep he had since becoming a Grey Warden, which was a pleasant surprise to say the least. However, something just felt like it was missing and he could not quite put his finger on it while he was waking up.

When he sat up, he began to hear sniggering coming from some of the other wardens. "So how's the mage doing?" one of the men asked.

Alistair's eyes went wide, "It's not like that," he hissed and he started to look around him. On Railan's bedroll were two folded blankets but no sign of the man. "Where is Railan?" Concern started to build in his gut. Maybe the mage was not well last night, he thought. He had survived the joining but could there have been some other problem that he had not known about.

One of the older wardens spoke up, "Do not worry so much boy, Duncan and Railan are attending a meeting with the king. They should be back shortly." The ranger walked over to Alistair and put a hand on the younger man's shoulder. "Do not let them get to you," he whispered. "The mage would have frozen last night if you had not kept him warm."

Alistair nodded, and slowly began to get dressed and ready for the busy day ahead.

Most of the day Alistair was on one task or another but he would occasionally look back towards where the war council meeting was. He wondered how the newest warden was doing and hoped he would have a chance to talk to him before the battle.

When Duncan was done with the meeting, Alistair saw him give a few orders to his second and then he requested Alistair to come with him and they joined Railan by the fire.

Alistair felt himself growing furious as he listened to Duncan explain his orders. "So I will not be in the battle," he growled trying to keep his temper in check.

Alistair was so focused on trying to argue with Duncan that he did not notice the mage watching him with worry written all over his face.

Railan suddenly spoke up, "I am ready to go."

Alistair jumped, he had forgotten that the other man was even there, and with a sigh he agreed too, "Yes, so am I."

"From here, you two are on your own," Duncan spoke looking at both of them. "Remember, you are both Grey Wardens. I expect you to be worthy of that title." Duncan turned to leave.

"Duncan," Alistair stopped him, he felt bad about arguing and wanted to say something, anything but was not sure what he could say to apologize. "May the Maker watch over you."

Duncan nodded, "May he watch over us all."

Alistair watched silently as his mentor and friend left to prepare for the coming battle. He gave a sign and turned towards the man standing beside him. He reached out with a hand intending to put it on the mages shoulder but lowered it again when Railan took a step back.

Alistair frowned; he was worried that he may have hurt the other man. "I am sorry," he mumbled, "I just want to explain."

Railan shook his head and interrupted, "It's ok, it was my fault, and I should be the one apologizing. I'm still not used to being away from the tower."

"But," Alistair was confused, he had wanted to apologize but the mage seemed to blame himself, "what?"

"I am used to a bed, and walls and being protected from the elements." The mage smiled shyly, blushing slightly. "I appreciate what you did. I had not realized how cold I really was or that there were more blankets. So thank you," he sighed softly, looking deep into Alistair's eyes, "it was nice to wake up warm for the first time since leaving the tower."

Alistair knew his mouth was hanging open, and he closed it with a clack. He was completely surprised by the kind words that the younger man spoke. "You are welcome," he said returning the smile. As the silence began to grow slightly awkward, he spoke in a tone that sounded odd even to himself, "So, we should be going."


	2. Wilds

Waking up in the small room, Railan held his head, which seemed to be spinning wildly. He had no idea where he was or even how he had gotten there. As hard as he might he could not remember what had happened. He heard noises coming from across the room and attempted to sit up. His head throbbed painfully again and he tried to pull just a bit of magic to sooth the pain, but found that even that did not seem to dispel the dizziness or restore his memory.

"Ah, your eyes finally open," said the woman across the room. "Mother shall be pleased to hear this."

Railan blinked his eyes trying to focus as the woman came closer to him, he recognized her to be the witch they had met in the Kokari wilds.

"Why am I here? Where's Alistair? What happened to the darkspawn?" Railan asked looking around the room too quickly and had to grab his head to keep from losing focus.

"Easy, mage, you were injured, and then Mother rescued you. Do you not remember?"

"No, it's foggy; I can't seem to focus on what actually happened. What happened to the army? The king? What about the other Grey Wardens?"

"You are full of questions aren't you? I will answer what I can but Mother asked to see you when you awoke," Morigan answered coolly. She sighed and put a cool hand to his forehead before she told him what had happened during the battle. "Your friend…he is not taking it well."

The cold touch seemed to keep the fire in his head pushed back but he felt nauseated at the news nonetheless. "Well, I'm not taking it well either," he stammered. The news was unsettling at best and horrific at worst. Then a thought about how hard this must be for Alistair. Ralian may not have known the other Wardens well but they were Alistair's friends. "Where is Alistair?" he asked again.

"He is outside by the fire. You might wish to head out there and speak to mother if you are well enough." She reached out a hand to help Railan up and he rose wobbling slightly but he remained upright.

Once the room stopped spinning he moved toward the door. As he reached out for it he looked over his shoulder and said softly, "Thank you for helping me, Morrigan."

"I…I truly did nothing to deserve praise," Morrigan stammered shocked, taking a step back. "You are welcome though I am no healer." She watched him with dark eyes as he turned back to the door.

Railan nodded, but let it go, "I will go, then."

Railan pushed the door open and headed outside. The sun blinded him for a moment and he stood waiting by the door for a moment until his vision cleared. The dizziness had started to clear and he felt a little stronger each moment.

"See? " Morrigan's mother was the first to notice him standing there. "Here is your fellow Grey Warden. You worry too much, young man."

Alistair turned slowly, and looked at him as though he was seeing a ghost. Railan noticed that the other Warden's eyes were bloodshot. The thought of Alistair's pain made Railan blink back his own tears.

"You… you're alive?" Alistair asked finally finding his voice and coming to stand closer to him. "I thought...You fell to the floor in the tower… I thought you… you were."

"I'm fine," Railan said stopping the other man's ramblings and smiled sadly at the templar. "I appreciate your concern."

"This doesn't seem real. Maybe it isn't real, maybe we did die on that tower."

"I am very much alive and so are you thanks to Morrigan's mother."

"Do not talk about me as if I am not present, lads," Morrigan's mother snapped at them.

"We didn't mean anything by it," Railan said smoothing things over. "But what do we call you? You never told us your name."

The witch cackled fiercely. "Names are useless here in the forest. But I suppose you, like the Chasind folk, can call me Flemeth."

"The Flemeth, from the legends? The Witch of the Wilds?" Alistair asked wide-eyed.

"Witch? I know a bit of magic and it has served you both well, has it not?"

"I'm sorry Flemeth, we meant no offence. We are grateful for you magical abilities," Railan said bowing slightly to show his elder respect. He had been raised by the Circle to respect other mages and he wasn't about to insult the infamous Flemeth. "But now we need to figure out what needs to be done."

Railan knelt down by the small pond and splashed some cold water on his face trying to fathom what they faced. Currently they were the only two Grey Wardens in Fereldan and there was still an Archdemon to defeat. Ending the Blight, Railan thought to himself incredulously. Those three simple words seem far too big for just the two of them to do. But they would do whatever they had to in order to see their goal met.

As they discussed what lay before them and what assets they had at their disposal, Alistair brought up the treaties. The warrior dug into his satchel and pulled out the rolled parchment. Duncan had left them with him, which might be what would save them in the end.

Alistair also suggested that they seek help from Arl Eamon of Redcliffe, that he might still have forces that could help them end the Blight. Railan suggested that they head there first.

Just as they were going to set out Flemeth offered one final aide to their journey. Morrigan. And although the young witch did not seem too happy about the idea she agreed to it anyway.

* * *

So the three of them headed away from Flemeth's cabin. Morrigan leading the way through the wilds as sure footed in the forest that had been her home for most of her life. Railan was not certain if they could truly trust the other mage, but he knew that they were in need of any help they could get. Having been raised in the Tower he found it hard to find a common ground with the witch.

Railan watched Alistair out of the corner of his eye. The almost templar had been so reclusive since the events in the tower. They had both been shocked by the news of the battle, and the loss of the other wardens. Alistair had been oblivious to the fact that his words had actually hurt Railan. Railan tried to be positive about their need to move forward to complete the Grey Warden's necessary duty. He also knew that when the other warden was ready he would talk to him.

As they walked, Railan did notice that the trees were thinning which meant that they would soon be out of the forest. Once at the village they would have to get supplies but they would also have to be careful. There was no knowing what others knew about the events that had happened at Ostegar. To make matters worse they would be two mages outside of the chantries control, which could also cause problems for them. Part of him hoped that others might over look that since they were traveling with a "Templar". Maybe they should look into getting Alistair some templar armor, Railan thought to himself.

A sudden motion of something racing through the bushes coming towards them caused all three of them to be on guard. They were ready to attack whatever might be heading their way. A loud bark announced the arrival of the mabari hound as it bounced through the bushes in front of them. They all relaxed for only a second when the dog turned and growled ahead.

The three humans looked farther ahead and became aware of nearly a dozen darkspawn running at them with their weapons drawn ready for the attack.

As they neared, Railan's head swam a bit but he shook it off needing to focus. He pulled forth magic into his hands and once the darkspawn were within range he let loose lightning that shocked several of the short genlocks who had been up front stunning them enough to cause congestion with those darkspawn behind them.

Railan noticed Alistair and the dog rushing at the darkspawn with a loud yell and howl before they began beating them down. The one thing they did not see in the thick of the battle was the tall Alpha in golden armor. The beast made a crude gesture that was unmistakably of slicing one's neck. Railan took in the scene as quickly as he could and knew that he would not be able to do any mass spells with his companions amongst the enemies. The mage called forth a spell of ice and sent it directly at the Alpha who was ready to strike at Alistair. The spell struck true and ice formed upon the armor thick enough to hold the beast in that pose for a little while. Railan followed up that spell with a direct strike of lightening which shook the beast.

Alistair looked over his shoulder and suddenly became aware of the Alpha behind him. He spun and struck out with his sword followed by a shield bash, which shattered the still frozen darkspawn. When that one was down, he returned his attention to the two genlocks he had previously incapacitated.

With the Alpha down, Railan focused on the three archers who were standing farther back in the trees. He quickly calculated the distance and summoned a fireball while he took a couple of quick steps forward, before letting the fireball shoot forward. The blast killed the middle darkspawn and knocked the other two to the ground flames billowing off them. A couple of quick blasts from his staff finished them off.

Railan then looked to see what target needed to be taken out next only to find that Morrigan and the dog had leveled the remaining darkspawn completely. He was truly impressed at how efficiently the four of them had taken care of the enemy. They may be an unusual group but when needed they seemed to be able to work together.

The others regrouped near Railan, with the dog bouncing around in front of him. The hound wagged his tail happily and licked Railan's hand as he bent down to pat him.

"Hmm, I think this is the mabari I helped cure back at Ostagar," Railan said after inspecting the mabari.

"I think he was out there looking or you," Alistair responded thoughtfully. "He's chosen you. Mabari are like that. They call it imprinting."

"Does this mean we are going to have this beast following us about now?" Morrigan asked disapprovingly. "Wonderful."

"Morrigan, I would have thought you would like having an animal around, since you are more comfortable with them than people," Railan commented.

"Yes, wild free creatures of the forest, but not domesticated mongrels," she sneered.

"Well he most certainly can come, since we aren't in a position to turn away help no matter what form it comes in." Railan smiled down at the dog as he barked happily. "Now what should we call you my four legged friend? I think a nice strong name… what do you think of Lodan?" The dog barked and bounced from side to side excitedly. "Lodan it is."


	3. Lothering Camp

Lothering was a small village that had doubled in size due to the refugees. However, the survivors were not moving nearly as fast as the darkspawn and the village would soon be overrun. They knew there was little they could do to help them except for ending the Blight or more villages would share the same fate.

The party which had grown in numbers to six now, stayed camped for one night outside of Lothering. It was a restless night for Alistair as he kept sensing the darkspawn throughout the forest, though none of them were near enough to be a threat currently. Earlier he had tried to sleep only to have the nightmares wake him. Being unable to sleep he volunteered to take over the watch for Lelianna, which she agreed to gratefully then headed to her tent to get some sleep.

The night was eerily quiet, as most of the animals had fled the area after sensing the nearness of the darkspawn. The silence was only broken occasionally by the thrashing about coming from Railan's tent.

Alistair felt bad for the mage; he must have been having similar nightmares to his own. The mumbling and tossing around in the mage's tent began to increase and were punctuated by some yelps. Alistair was wondering if he should check on the other man. From his training, he knew that mages could have problems with demons while they slept, but he was not sure if Railan would have those same problems since he was a Grey Warden now.

The sounds from the tent went silent for a bit and Railan stumbled out holding his head.

"Bad dreams, huh?" Alistair asked quietly.

"It seemed so real…" Railan mumbled, "Different from the Fade but still incredibly real."

That's interesting, Alistair thought, he can tell the difference between the Fade and the darkspawn dreams.

"Well it is real, sort of," Alistair nodded; he understood how confusing the dreams could be. "We hear what the darkspawn hear. We hear the Achedemon. It…'talks' to them and we feel it just as they do. That's why we know this a Blight."

"Are these dreams going to happen a lot?" Railan asked, a frown creasing his forehead.

Here comes that bad news, he thought, before speaking. "It's worse during a Blight, but with some time," Alistair nodded sadly, he remembered when Duncan explained the dreams to him, "eventually you can block the dreams out. Anyhow, when I heard you thrashing around, I thought I should tell you. I may not know a lot but I'm happy to help where I can."

"Thank you, Alistair," Railan said giving Alistair a friendly smile. "I appreciate it."

"That's what I'm here for. To deliver unpleasant news and witty one-liners," Alistair joked. He looked up from the fire and saw how extremely tired the mage looked, but they still had a long way to go. He poured some tea and handed the metal mug to Railan. "Here, it might help a bit."

"Thanks," Railan said as he took the mug and sat near the fire. "Once the others are up we can be on our way."

Alistair nodded knowing that they would be heading to his childhood home in the next day. He let the silence drag on as he watched the mage. The other man was quiet most of the time unless there was something important to attend to. Alistair had the distinct impression that Railan was still not entirely comfortable being out of the Tower, but he wasn't about to pry into what was bothering him.

"So we should be near Redcliffe by nightfall if we keep a quick pace," Alistair said breaking the silence. The mage looked up watching Alistair intently but only nodded letting him continue, "I wanted to talk to you about that before we are there."

"What's on your mind, Alistair?"

Alistair frowned, "Well let's see. Did I say how I know Arl Eamon exactly?"

"I think you said he raised you."

"I'm a bastard," Alistair blurted out. "My mother was a serving girl at Redcliffe castle and she died when I was born. Arl Eamon took me in and raised me before I was sent to the Chantry. The reason he did that was because…well because my father. He was King Maric"

"So…you're not just a bastard but a royal bastard?" Railan joked disbelievingly.

Alistair laughed, and he felt a blush creeping up his cheeks at the mage's joke, "Yes, I guess it does at that. I should use that line more often. I would have told you, but…it never really meant anything to me. I was inconvenient, so my existence was kept secret. Everyone who knew either resented me for it or they coddled me…even Duncan kept me out of the fighting because of it. I didn't want you to know as long as possible. I'm sorry."

"It's really alright Alistair. Anyway I think I understand."

Alistair thought he saw something flicker across the mage's face before his calm mask was back in place. He wondered what it might have been but quickly put that thought aside. He had the rest of his story to finish while he still had the guts to tell it.

Alistair sighed, "Good. I'm glad. It's not like I got special treatment for it anyhow. Arl Eamon eventually married a young woman from Orlais. He loved her a great deal. Anyway, the new arlessa resented the rumors, which pegged me as the arl's bastard. They weren't true, but of course they existed. So, off I was packed to the nearest monastery at the age of ten. Just as well, the arlessa had made the castle a miserable place for me."

"I'm sorry, that is truly and awful thing to do to a child," Railan commented looking down and frowning. "It almost sounds like many of the stories that mages have," he said almost too soft to hear. "Not that that matters, continue."

Alistair couldn't help but stare at the mage and wonder if what he had heard may have been related to the other man's past. "She felt threatened by my presence, I can see that now. I'm not sure I can blame her for it. She wondered if the rumors were true herself." Alistair paused trying to organize his thoughts and see where he wanted to proceed from there. He really wasn't used to talking to anyone and especially not someone who seemed to actually care about what he was saying.

"I guess, I do have one regret about the whole thing. I had an amulet that was my mother's. When they told me I was going to be sent away I furiously tore it off and threw it at the wall and it shattered. It was so stupid but I was mad and felt so unwanted." Alistair stopped the memories had been from so long ago but still stung as they had nearly ten years ago. "The arl came by to see me a few times but I was stubborn. I hated it there and I blamed him for all of it. Eventually he stopped coming."

"It's alright Alistair, you were young," the mage consoled him.

"And raised by dogs apparently," he joked, " or I may as well have been, the way I acted. But maybe all young bastards act like that, I don't know."

"Well if that's the case you can teach me how bastards act," Railan said with a coy smile. "I never knew who my father was, not that knowing parents means much when raised in the tower. Sorry for interrupting."

Alistair had to chuckle as the mage let down his guard just a little. He would have to store that little bit of knowledge a way for later. "I may not be a good example of what a young bastard should be, but I could give you some tips if you'd like." He blushed again and realized that what he said might not be taken the proper way.

Railan smiled for just a moment more before he said, "Maybe I'll take you up on that offer, after we take care of the Blight."

A cloud of what the future might be passed into his mind and he became serious once again, "Right, all I know is that the arl is a good man. He also was King Cailan's uncle, so he has a personal motivation to see Loghain pay. So there you have it, that's my story. Now can we just pretend that I'm just some nobody who was too lucky to die with the rest of the Grey Wardens."

"Oh," Railan inhaled surprised, "That's not really what you think, is it?"

"No, I…" Alistair sighed, "I suppose not. At least I have a chance to make things right, and I'm not alone. Thank you for more than you know."


	4. Redcliffe Village

It was nearly dark when they neared the broken gates of Redcliffe village. They could not see what was wrong but knew that the signs of destruction were not good. Debris littered the streets and no signs of life could be seen. The only spark of hope for the party was that there were candles burning in the chantry.

Railan slowly lead them to the large stone building, it was easily the biggest structure in the village. He still wasn't used to being the leader of their little party, but out of necessity he was learning. It had helped that it was more than just the three of them, but there were times that he found himself fighting with the mage instinct to follow rather than lead especially as they neared the chantry. All his teachings from the sisters in the tower came rushing back to him. Magic was created to serve man and not rule over him rang in his ears warring with what Duncan had told him that Grey Wardens do what they must. He pushed both those thoughts back as focused on the here and now.

As he neared the door, he heard sounds from inside. He eased the door open and was greeted by frightened shrieks. Those near the doors pressed themselves back against the walls. Children peaked out from behind their mother's skirts. The women brandished daggers at them. Railan raised his hands to try to pacify the frightened villagers.

Railan was surprised to realize that most of the people in the chantry were women, children and elderly. The group moved slowly past the survivors toward the head of the chantry, that was where Railan noticed some official looking people who sounded like they were trying to plan something and were surrounded by the men of the village.

"Ho there," Railan called out causing the locals to turn and look at him.

"Who are you?" asked a man wearing golden Redcliffe armor.

"We are Grey Wardens," Railan responded calmly in spite of the strange welcome they had received. "We have come to speak with Arl Eamon."

"I am Teagan, brother to the arl and Bann of Rainesfere," said the younger man who seemed to only be a few years older than Alistair. "And this is Ser Perth," he said gesturing to the armed warrior who was next to him.

"Teagan?" Alistair spoke up finally. "I remember you. I was a lot younger when we met and I think…" the next was said bashfully as Railan noticed Alistair's cheeks color, "I was covered in mud."

"Mud?" Railan watched as recognition dawned on the bann's face and he smiled fondly at the memory. "Alistair! You're alive. This is such wonderful news. We were led to believe that all at Ostagar had fallen."

"Yes, not all the Grey Wardens died," Railan said grimly. "I'm Railan Amell. It's a pleasure to meet you, my lord."

"Teagan please, no need to be so formal," he said with a small smile. "You said that you are here to see Eamon, unfortunately that might not be possible at this point."

"What do you mean?" Alistair asked concern evident in his voice.

"Eamon is ill. Gravely ill," Ser Perth responded. "His guards were sent out to try and find a cure for him. Very few of them remained in the castle."

"No one has heard from the castle in days," Teagan said solemnly. "The attacks started a few nights ago. Skeletal beings came down and assaulted the village. We have holed up and defended those who remained here in the chantry."

Suddenly the doors to the chantry flew open and a woman came rushing into the sanctuary. The woman stumbled falling to her knees in her haste to move toward the group at the front. Teagan stepped near her recognizing and helping the woman as she straightened up.

"Lady Isolde, how is the castle? We had no word to know if there were survivors."

"Oh Teagan, it is terrible a mage has released horrible creatures upon the castle. Few survive," the arlessa spoke with a severe Orlesian accent that Railan struggled to understand. He had known very few Orlesians in the tower and was only just getting used to Leliana's accent. "You must come back to the castle with me, now!"

"Alistair," Teagan began cautiously, "I hate to ask this of you but would you be willing to help?"

"Well, I would like to, but I can't speak for everyone… Railan?" Alistair asked giving Railan a sad look that nearly broke his heart. "We don't stand much of a chance against Loghain without Arl Eamon."

Railan had never really known a family but he could only imagine what he would feel like if something like this was happening at the tower. He gave an understanding smile to his fellow Warden and nodded slowly, "Of course we'll help."

"NO!" shrieked the Orlesian. "I was told to come back with only Teagan."

"Alright Isolde," Teagan sighed trying to sooth the agitated woman, "I will go with you just wait by the door and I will give some final orders to the men here."

The arlessa walked to the door not once acknowledging the people from her village who called out to her.

"Here's the plan, I'll go in with Isolde and you enter the castle from the passage that connects to the dungeon."

"That sounds good, but will you be safe going in unprotected?" Railan commented.

"I should be and if nothing else I can distract whatever is inside and let you get in unnoticed." He looked over at the woman standing by the door impatiently stamping her foot. "I can delay no longer. Good luck."

Railan nodded and watched as Teagan left with Isolde. He knew there were huge gaps in the plan and that so very many things could go wrong but he would have to play some of it by ear.

"Are we truly just going to send him with that woman?" Leliana asked in a hushed tone.

"You're right it is dangerous," Railan let out a sigh, "but we have to work with the resources available to us. Morrigan, Leli, Alistair and I will head up to the tunnel entrance and work our way through the castle. Alistair, do you remember enough of the castle to lead us through?"

Frowning, the warrior nodded, "It's been a while since I was last here but I think I can remember."

"We'll figure it out but I'm sure it will take some time especially if we run into any of these skeletal creatures and demons. At daybreak, Ser Perth you and your men come to the front gate. We'll get in and open the gate for you. That way we can have some reinforcements when we confront the problem in the castle."

"My men and I will be there," agreed Ser Perth. "We will take shifts defending here so that we are ready for what awaits us at the castle."

"Sten, you and Lodan will stay here. Help them defend the villagers tonight." Sten grunted but did not argue with his orders.

Railan was astounded at how much he sounded like a leader as he gave instructions and planned for this attack. He was changing and adapting to his new position quickly and surprisingly he was enjoying this.

He nodded more to himself than anyone else and made the commented to them, "If all goes as planned, hopefully this will all be over tomorrow." Railan, the witch, the bard and the warrior headed out into the dusk eve to the windmill which held the entrance to the dungeon.


	5. Past Relations

As they moved through the dungeon, they heard a commotion coming from down the hall. As they neared, the walking dead turned to look at them. Then they ran straight at the party. Railan cast a quick frost spell slowing their approach as Leliana and Alistair drew their weapons. The corpses fell easily and the attack ended as quickly as it had begun.

"Hello? Is there someone out there? Who is that?" came a meek voice from one of the cells, as the occupant stepped weakly up to the bars. "By all that's holy… it's you! I can't believe it…"

"Jowan?" Railan stumbled for words, "Jo, is it you? How?" He was shocked and amazed to see his old friend locked in the dungeon. "I never expected that you were the mage Lady Isolde mentioned."

"Oh, you've spoken with her," Jowan took a step back from the bars and looked cautiously at Railan. "Then you know what I've done?"

"So it is true," Railan nodded slowly, "it is just one more crime you've committed then."

"Yes," Jowan said softly, "I poisoned the arl. For all I know, he's dead already."

"Poison? What? I was talking about the walking corpses and the attacks on the village." Railan sputtered confused once again. "As for the arl, NO, he is not dead, at least not yet."

"He's not? That's a relief," Jowan gave a tired smile but Railan was not going to soften just because he smiled. "Please, I know how it seems. Poisoning the arl was… a terrible thing. However, I am not behind everything that is happening here. I swear!" Jowan sighed and frowned, "Before I say anything else, I need to ask you a question, please. Then you can do whatever you feel you need to afterward, but I need to know…What became of Lily?" Tears welled in the older mage's eyes as he continued, "They did not hurt her, did they? The thought that she might have paid for my crime…"

Railan had forgotten that the rest of his party was just behind them as the two mages spoke. The dagger that seemed to always sit in Railan's heart since he left the tower twisted painfully at Jowan's questions, and he had to close his eyes and take a deep breath before he could even respond. Although he tried to control his emotions, he was no calmer than before when he hissed back at the other mage, "You used her! Why should you care?" He couldn't bring himself to accuse the other man of using him just yet. Part of him knew he had let Jowan use him.

"No, I truly loved her," Jowan pleaded.

Railan opened his eyes even though he felt tears sting his eyes, his anger the only thing keeping his tears from falling, "Oh so you only used me then!"

"Yes…no…I am sorry for what I did…to both of you," Jowan sobbed the last coming out as barely a whisper.

"You can keep your apology," Railan spat. "As for Lilly, the Chantry sent her away, but I don't know where."

"Oh my poor Lily. She must hate me now, too." Jowan rested his hands on the bars in front of him to keep himself steady as tears fell down his cheeks. "I have done so many stupid things," he said shaking his head.

All Railan could do was watch, his own tears streaking down his cheeks as he watched the man he used to love cry over his lost love. Railan did not say anything and after a moment, Jowan straightened up and looked into Railan's eyes. The two men stared at each other for some time, neither one knowing what to say.

Jowan was the first to speak, "So. Here we are again, the two of us. What happens now?"

Railan swallowed hard and reigned in his emotions before he spoke in a level cold tone, "Are you responsible for what's happened here?"

"I…I know it looks suspicious, but I'm not responsible for the creatures and the killings in the castle," Jowan pleaded. "I was already imprisoned when all that began. At first, Lady Isolde came here with her men demanding that I reverse what I had done. I thought she meant my poisoning the arl." Jowan turned and leaned against the cell wall resting his head back and looking at the ceiling. "That's the first I heard about the walking corpses. She thought I had summoned a demon to torment her family and destroy Redcliffe. She… had me tortured, but there was nothing I could say. So they …they left me here to rot."

"Why did you poison Arl Eamon?" Railan asked quickly, trying to keep focus when he felt his heart tighten at the thought of someone torturing the man he had loved.

Jowan came close to the bars again, speaking softly as though the walls had ears. "I was instructed to by Teyrn Loghain. I was told that Arl Eamon was a threat to Ferelden, that if I dealt with him Loghain would settle matters with the Circle. All I wanted was to be able to return-"

Railan huffed and slammed his hand against a bar. "Return?" he interrupted harshly. "Why should you get to return home when no one else can!"

"I know it was just one more stupid thing I've done," Jowan snapped back. "But it doesn't matter does it because he abandoned me here, didn't he? Everything has fallen apart. I never thought it would end like this!" Jowan took a few steps back deeper into the cell and covered his face. "Maker, I've made so many mistakes. I disappointed so many people…," he whispered. "I wish I could go back and fix it. I just want to make everything right again."

"I wish that too," Railan whispered also, "but we cannot change the past, can we." He took a deep breath before continuing, "However, you are a blood mage, Jowan. How can you make things right?"

"I don't know. I dabbled because it seemed the only way Lily and I could escape, the only way I could avoid being made tranquil," Jowan locked eyes with Railan. "I swear, if I knew what would happen, I'd have never started down this path… I would never have listened to Loghain."

"So the teyrn hired you to poison Arl Eamon?" Railan asked. "But why get a mage?"

"Connor had started to show…signs of magic. Lady Isolde was terrified the Circle of Magi would take him away for training."

"Connor? A mage?" Alistair asked. "I can't believe it!"

Railan jumped when Alistair spoke and he realized again that he had not been alone. His mind started racing the rest of the party had heard them argue and seen them cry. He had let his emotions get the better of him.

Jowan continued directing his comment to all of them now that the others had reminded them of their presence, "She sought an apostate, to teach her son so he could learn to hide his talent."

"How much magic did you teach Connor?" Railan asked regaining his composure after being startled.

"Some," Jowan said thoughtfully. "Nevertheless, he is still very young. He can barely cast a minor spell - never mind something more powerful. At least not intentionally."

"Youth doesn't necessarily mean they can't do terrible things," Morrigan commented. To Railan she sounded as though she was speaking from experience.

"I have thought about it and its possible Connor could have inadvertently done something to tear open the Veil," Jowan added. "With the Veil to the Fade torn, demons could infiltrate the castle. Powerful ones could kill and create those walking corpses."

"Yeah I know that too, remember I was taught at the tower too." Railan commented snidely.

"So did Arl Eamon know of his son's abilities?" Alistair asked.

"No. Lady Isolde was adamant that he never find out. She said that he'd do the right thing, even if it meant losing their son."

"Having been raised by the Circle, I might not be the one best able to understand that," Railan said and rolled his eyes. "So then why go after the arl if he didn't know."

"In my time here I discovered that the arl's a decent man, but it was too late I had already slipped him the poison," Jowan said sadly. "I wondered how he could possibly be the threat Loghain said he was, but I did it anyway." He lowered his head and shook it when he mumbled, "I'm such a fool."

Railan chuckled softly and shook his head. "I would agree with you except that would make me an even bigger one." The emotional rollercoaster he had been on prevented him from keeping such comments to himself and it was too late to worry about pretenses in front of his companions.

Jowan glared at Railan but wisely chose not to comment, "I'm just sick of running away and hiding from what I've done. I am going to try to fix it, any way I can. We were friends once. I know I don't deserve to call you that, after what I did…if it ever meant anything, please… help me fix this."

"Why should I help you? I helped you once because we were lov-we were friends," Railan took a step back from the bars of the cell trying to distance himself to keep from getting hurt again, although he knew it was already too late for that.

"I know I betrayed you. I am sorry, so sorry! Please," Jowan begged, "won't you help me try do one thing right in my life?"

"I say this boy could still be of use to us," Morrigan chimed in. "But if not, then let him go. Why keep him prisoner here?"

"Hey, hey!" Alistair said excitedly. "Let's not forget he's a blood mage! You can't just…set a blood mage free!"

"Better to slay him? Better to punish him for his choices?" Morrigan began yelling. "Is this Alistair who speaks or the templar?"

"Templar?" Jowan asked Railan quietly glaring at the younger man, while the other two continued arguing. "You managed to leave the tower and still have your very own templar. Why does that not surprise me?"

"Almost Templar," Railan whispered. "But yes it looks that way."

"I'd say its common sense. We don't even know the whole story yet," Alistair shouted back at Morrigan.

"He wishes to redeem himself…" Lelianna said trying to calm the witch and templar down, "doesn't everyone deserve that chance?"

"Like yourself, you mean?" Morrigan snapped at the bard. "How many sisters do you know who can fight?"

"Everyone deserves a chance to redeem themselves in the Maker's eyes; this man no less than any," Lelianna spoke calling on her chantry training.

Alistair sighed, turning to Railan, "He's your_ friend_. You know him best…" Railan winced at the harsh tone Alistair used when he said the word friend.

"Give me a chance, please," Jowan begged.

Railan thought about it for a moment before responding softly, "I think you'll stay in your cell for now. It will be safer for you in there than out here."

Jowan nodded slinking back to the far corner of the cell. "Then I will wait. If you change your mind, I will be here."

Railan nodded and had to force himself to turn and leave, a piece of him wanting to stay or let Jowan out anything to help the man who he had loved even though the other had hurt him so many times now. A part of him was still madly in love with the other mage. He closed his eyes for a moment and said a silent prayer for his old friend. No matter what he might have said, he still thought of Jowan as a friend. The two of them had been through so much together to have all those old feeling just disappear. After they fixed whatever was going on he would try to do what he could to help Jowan.


	6. Redcliffe Mystery

Silently Railan walked up the stairs to the main level of the castle. He did not even look over his shoulder to see if his companions were following. He was mad at himself for losing control and the outburst that they had seen, even though they might understand he just did not want to talk about it at the moment.

Railan went through the castle in a trance like state; he was glad that Alistair knew where to go since he was little help leading in his present state. He knew they battled a great number of undead skeletons, and demons, but none of it actually reached him through the numbness that surrounded him currently. His thoughts were still back in the dungeon.

Before they exited the castle to the courtyard, Alistair grabbed his arm and pulled him aside in the cellar. "I can't even begin to understand how hard that was for you, and I'm the last one who should get on your case but I need you to be here. I need you to focus on what we are doing, please. Can you do that?"

Railan looked into Alistair's caramel eyes. "Yes, you're right," he swallowed thickly and nodded. "I'm alright." His look was still grim but he squared his shoulders and was ready to face whatever was beyond the door.

The mage grasped the handle and pulled the door open enough that they could look out and see what they would be up against. There was a cluster of undead skeletons and one taller creature that he was not certain what it was across the courtyard. He also noticed archers up the stairs by the main door. Since the sun was back up, Ser Perth and his men were at the gate and just needed to have it opened and they could help with the undead.

"Leliana," Railan said turning to his group ready to give instructions, "I want you to run as fast as you can to the lever and get the gate open, then from there you can give Ser Perth and his men some cover fire, so that they can engage the creatures. Alistair, I will need you to try to get the large one's attention. I will have to get closer before I can paralysis it and Morrigan can try some curses that might weaken it. I do not know what that thing is but I have a feeling that if it starts to attack either of us directly this will not go well. I think that the big one should be our primary focus and once it's down we can worry about the smaller ones." Railan looked around at his companions and nodded, "If everyone is ready we should do this."

When they all nodded Railan pulled the door open and Leliana shot out first making a break for the gate, followed by Alistair who ran at the tall creature as it started for Leliana. The warrior shouted to gain its attention.

Railan headed out hitting a couple of archers with lightning as he made his way closer to the tall dark creature. As he neared, he recognized what they were up against from books he had read at the tower. It was a revenant. These creatures were supposed to be immune to most magic but the mage had to try to stop or slow it. He knew Alistair would not be able to take the creature on for long without some help. He heard the other soldiers nearing so he cast a paralysis to try to stop it. The revenant ignored the spell and kept up its attack on Alistair.

Beginning to worry Railan hit the creature with a frost attack, which barely slowed it. Another spell of ice flew out from his hand. That spell froze around the creature halting it mid attack. It also froze three other skeletons and one of the soldiers. As long as the soldier did not take any attacks, he should be ok once the spell wore off, but just in case Railan cast a healing spell on him and apologized silently to the man.

He knew that the spell would not hold the undead creatures for long but it gave the men long enough to take down the revenant and the other frozen skeletons. The men then ran up the stairs to cut down the archers.

"Thank you, Ser Perth," Railan called out as he neared the knight after the fighting stopped.

"Thank you as well. We are eager to see our arl again," Ser Perth said. "Shall we enter the main hall together? We should see what the cause of this is."

"Of course," Railan nodded, "let's go."

The party entered through the doors, down the corridor and to the main hall, flanked by Perth and his men. The sight that met them was disturbing to say the least. They watched as Bann Teagan danced about as a fool in front of Connor. Railan frowned, he could feel the magic seeping from the boy and there was another presence within him as well. He knew that this would not end well.

Connor waved his hand and Teagan sat down at his feet. The boy focused on the new comers instead. "So these are our visitors? The ones you told me about, Mother?"

Railan noticed a double tone that was warned to be a sign of demon possession.

"Y-yes, Connor," Isolde said meekly.

"And this is the one who defeated my soldiers? It has made a mess of the castle? And now it's staring at me!" Connor shrieked. "What is it Mother? I can't see it well enough."

"This…this is just a man, Connor. Like your father…"

"Oh, I'm tired of hearing about him! Besides, he's nothing at all like Father. Look at him! Breathing and not dying in the slightest! I could change that, mind you…"

Railan felt the surge of magic that was being aimed in their direction. Subtly he pulled forth some of his own magic to defend them if needed.

"C-Connor, I beg you, don't hurt anyone!" Isolde interrupted.

"Mother? What…what's happening? Where am I?" Connor said holding his head, this time without the echoing sound to his voice. Railan noticed the magical force ebbed and the other presence vanished for the moment.

"Oh, thank the Maker! Connor!" Isolde grabbed her son in a hug. "Connor, can you hear me?"

"Get away from me fool woman!" Connor spoke in the double tone again and pushed his mother away harshly. "You are beginning to bore me."

"Maker's breath!" Ser Perth cursed under his breath. "What has happened here?"

Isolde seemed to remember that they had others in the hall and turned her attention to them, "Grey Warden…please do not hurt my son! He's not responsible for what he does!"

"You have been protecting him this entire time?" Railan asked trying to figure out what they could do to resolve this situation.

"Connor did not mean to do this! It was that mage!" Isolde cried.

"No, Jowan did not do this," Railan said coolly. He may not fully trust Jowan but he had to at least believe that this demonic presence was not his doing.

"But he is the one who poisoned Eamon. He started all this! He summoned this demon!"

Railan was not sure why he was defending Jowan but he could not help himself. "He may have been the one who did the poisoning but he did not summon-"

"Connor was just trying to help his father!" Isolde interrupted.

"And made a deal with the demon to do so! Foolish child." Morrigan spat at the child's mother.

The two mages looked at each other. They were both very aware of what would have to happen to stop the demon.

"It was a fair deal!" the demon screamed. "Father is alive, just as I wanted. Now it's my turn to sit on the throne and send out armies to conquer the world! Nobody tells me what to do anymore!"

Teagan began laughing maniacally, "Nobody tells him what to do! Nobody!"

"Quiet, uncle. I warned you what would happen if you kept shouting, didn't I?" Connor snapped. "But let's keep things civil since we have guests. This man will have the audience he seeks. Tell us…what has it come here for?"

"I came to stop you, Demon," Railan responded levelly.

"I'm not finished playing! It can't make me stop! I think it's trying to spoil my fun, Mother!"

"I…I don't think…" Isolde stuttered.

"Of course you don't. Ever since you sent the knights away, you do nothing but deprive me of my fun. Frankly, it's getting dull," Connor said with a smirk and glint in his eye. "I crave excitement! And action! This man spoiled my sport by destroying my play things, and now it'll repay me!"

Connor waved his hand and the Bann stood charging at Railan. Startled by the sudden attack he stumbled backward. Once he caught himself he called forth a blast of ice which struck the other man slowing his attack. Alistair coming to his aid slammed his shield against the Bann who fell unconscious. They then turned their attention to the other guards that were under the demons control. Once the guards were disabled Railan looked around trying to find Connor. The boy had fled the hall.

Isolde ran to Teagan's side and the man blinked his eyes. "I'm sorry," he said nodding to Railan.

"Teagan! Teagan, are you all right?" Isolde sobbed, "I would never have forgiven myself had you died, not after I brought you here. What a fool I am!" Helping Teagan up, she turned her attention to the Wardens. "Please! Connor is not responsible for this! There must be some way we can save him!"

"My Lady," Railan said softly trying to console the poor woman, "I do not wish to kill a child. Nevertheless, there is no other way. We are taught in the Circle that there is no way to remove a demon from a person. Morrigan, do you know of anything that might help?"

"There is only one way I know to stop an abomination," Morrigan said shaking her head.

"He is not always the demon you saw. Connor is still inside him, and sometimes he breaks through. Please, I just want to protect him!" Isolde began crying earnestly.

Teagan frowned at his brother's wife, "Isn't that what started this? You hired the mage to teach Connor in secret…to protect him."

"If they had discovered Connor had magic, then they'd take him away! I thought if he learned just enough to hide it, then…"

"Yes, they would have taken him away. The Circle would have taught him how to use his magic not hide it. But that would have been safer than this. I can understand how much damage someone can do when they don't understand the forces at their command," Railan shook his head trying to avoid his memories. "That does not matter now though, what's done is done. What are our options?"

"I wouldn't normally suggest slaying a child," Alistair swallowed hard, and took a deep breath before he continued, "but…he's an abomination. I'm not sure there's any choice."

Railan nodded at the almost templar. He would know about such things from his training, but this would still be hard for him because of his relations with Eamon. He also would never have had any real experience with an abomination till now.

Isolde looked around wildly and shouted, "No! What about the mage! He could know something of this demon! If he still lives, we could speak to him!"

"He's down in the dungeon," Railan said quietly the tightness in his chest starting again. "He's still alive."

"Then we should bring him here immediately. I do not know how much we can trust him, but we must find out what he knows. Teagan, could you find him?"

Teagan nodded, "I will try…though if he resists I will not hesitate to kill him. I'll return shortly."

While they were waiting for Teagan to return, Railan had a seat in one of the chairs on the side of the hall. Alistair joined him, and the mage knew that his fellow Warden had questions.

"Do you think that he will have any helpful information?" Alistair asked in a hushed tone.

"I don't know," Railan shrugged looking at the floor. "He knows blood magic. He might know something that Morrigan and I don't."

"He hurt you before," Alistair stated more than asked.

Railan nodded but remained silent. He did not want to get into it at the moment. He looked out of the corner of his eye to see the warrior. Alistair looked concerned but he seemed to recognize that now wasn't the time to discuss personal information.

"I just want you to know that I'm here for you," Alistair whispered, "if you ever need someone to talk to."

"Thank you, Alistair," Railan said looking up at the other man with a sad smile.

Isolde's shrill voice pierced the silence that had fallen over the hall, "You are lucky to be alive, Jowan, After all you've done."

Jowan was bound in shackles as Teagan lead him into the hall.

"Jowan," Railan said standing and interrupting what could go on to be a tirade by the arlessa, "we were wondering if you might know of a way to remove the demon from Connor that might save him."

"Well the demon in him needs to be destroyed. Killing Connor is… the easiest option, but there is another way," Jowan said to Railan, ignoring the nasty looks that Isolde was giving him. "A mage could confront the demon in the Fade, without hurting Connor himself."

Railan closed his eyes and nodded. He didn't know why he hadn't thought of that before. Entering the Fade could be dangerous but he had done it during the harrowing and it could be possible to fight the demon there. The problem would be how he might safely be able to enter the Fade.

"What do you mean? Is the demon not within Connor?" asked Teagan.

"No, not physically. The demon must have approached Connor in the Fade when he dreamed, and controls him from there. We can use the connection between them to find the demon."

"You can enter the Fade, then? And kill the demon without hurting my boy?" Isolde asked hopefully.

"I can enable another mage to do so," Jowan said watching Railan. They both knew that he would be the one going in. "It normally requires lyrium and several mages, but I can use blood magic."

"I won't have you using blood magic, Jowan," Railan shook his head, he knew there would be a catch to this plan. At the confused look from the others he added, "Blood magic uses the life force of others as raw mana."

"Yes, that's right. The ritual I know…well it requires life energy. A lot of it, in fact all of it…" Jowan explained.

"So someone must die?" Teagan asked incredulously. "Someone must be sacrificed?"

"Yes, and then we send another mage into the Fade. I can't enter because I'm doing the ritual. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything. It's not much of an option." Jowan shrugged and looked at the ground avoiding the glare that Railan was sending his way.

"I've been in the Fade before for the Harrowing, why can't we enter that way?" Railan growled at Jowan.

Jowan's head snapped up at that comment. "As you know, I never went through the Harrowing. I don't know how they do it, but the power has to come from somewhere, and that means either lyrium or blood."

"Then let it be my blood. I will be the sacrifice," Isolde chimed in.

"What? Isolde, are you mad? Eamon would never allow this!" Teagan began to yell.

"Either someone kills my son to destroy that thing inside him or I give my life so my son can live," she yelled back at Teagan. "To me, the answer is clear."

"Then allow me to do this instead. Connor will need his mother and Eamon will need you as well," suggested Teagan.

Out of the corner of his eye, Railan thought he saw Alistair paling. He couldn't see much of the other man and didn't want to turn at that moment. He knew neither option was really valid, but he had to consider them none the less. His thoughts were interrupted then by his fellow warden.

"Blood magic? Are we really going to consider using it?" Alistair asked, and Railan could not help but look over his shoulder at the warrior. "How can more evil be of any help here? Two wrongs don't make a right."

"Oh," Morrigan snorted, "and maybe it is something a man would never understand. It does seem like a sensible choice with a willing participant."

"Connor is blameless in this," Isolde begged, "He should not have to pay the price."

Teagan having calmed down some added, "You are the mage here, not I, my friend. You would be going into the Fade. The decision is yours."

"There is another way to enter the Fade. I know I have been there before. I wish I knew how they did it at the tower," Railan muttered.

"Could we go to the mages at the Circle of Magi. Jowan said we need lyrium and more mages, do you think they would help?" Alistair asked.

"They might. I didn't leave on the best of terms though," Railan shrugged avoiding the apologetic look Jowan was giving him. "The tower is not far from here."

Alistair smiled excitedly at his fellow Warden, "That is an excellent point. Plus one of the treaties is also for the Circle of Magi. We need to head that way no matter what."

"The tower is about a day's journey across the lake... You could attempt to get the mages' help," Teagan said.

"But what will happen here?" Isolde whined. "Connor will not remain passive forever."

"I think it's a chance we have to take," Alistair said.

"I will keep Jowan here as a precaution. He says he wants to help, so he will keep an eye on Connor with us," Teagan stated.

"I'll have Morrigan remain here as well," Railan said turning to the witch. "You can help keep him under sleep and stun spells, if needed. I also don't think it would be a good thing to take you to the tower."

She nodded, "I agree with that, Warden."

"Leli, and Alistair will come with me to the tower. The rest of my companions will help in the village."

"Very well," Teagan agreed, "go to the tower quickly then. The longer you are away, the greater the chances of disaster."


	7. Mage's Tower

Alistair kept a close eye on his fellow Warden. Railan had been silent since they left the castle and Alistair was worried about what was bothering the mage. He knew that it was not going to be easy for him to go back to the tower, even though the younger man was now a Grey Warden. He did not want to pry but he was curious what had happened to Railan at the tower. He hoped eventually the other man would trust him enough to let him know.

When they reached the docks, the mage squinted across the lake as if he could glare at the tower from here. Alistair quickly spoke to the harbor master and passing him some coins they had acquired passage across the lake.

When the three of them reached the other side of the lake it was night. The full moon lit the way as they reached the shore. The tower looked ominous it's great black silo-et blotting out the stars. The dark water was still, with only the small boat rippling as they crossed.

They were met by a templar when they stepped onto the rocky island. Railan walked up to the man.

"You! You're not supposed to be here, I have orders not to let anyone in," the templar shouted unnecessarily.

In the light of Railan's staff, Alistair could see the mage roll his eyes at the templar.

"I need to get in the tower, and I will get in there," Railan said his anger quite apparent in his voice.

It had been a long day for all of them, especially for the younger man. Alistair stepped up to the templar, and suddenly recognized the other. "Carroll, is that you?" Alistair asked.

The templar squinted, "Alistair, I never thought I would see you again." The men grasped arms in greeting.

"Carroll, we need to get in for official Grey Warden business."

"Grey Warden, hmmm…I thought that maybe you wanted to drop off this insolent little mage. He belongs in the dungeon for helping his blood mage lover."

Alistair saw the anger flash in the mage's eyes at that comment and had to smother his own surprise. After meeting Jowan in the dungeon he had known that the two mages had been close but his naivety had never connected the dots before. He was surprised to find out that Jowan and Railan had been that close. He also hadn't realized that Carroll had recognized Railan. He stepped between the two men quickly trying to diffuse the situation.

"We," he said signaling him and Railan with his hand, "are both Grey Wardens."

"Take us to Greagoir," Railan snapped.

Alistair was surprised at how Carroll had changed since they had last seen each other. The other templar looked far older even though they were the same age. Carroll had been kind before but the anger was evident on his face when he looked at the mage. Once again he thanked the Maker that Duncan had saved him from a similar fate.

Alistair knew how he had not fit in at the chantry and he was beginning to see how bad the tower might have been for someone like Railan, even if he didn't know everything about the other man. He would do what he could to protect his friend while they were at the tower. He squared his shoulders and marched toward the main gate purposefully slamming his shoulder into the other templar as he passed.

As they entered the tower, it was clear that something was going on. The Knight-Commander was giving orders and had not noticed their approach.

"I want two men to guard the doors at all times. Do not open the doors without my express consent," Greagoir barked.

"The doors are barred," Alistair whispered. "Are they keeping people out? Or in? As I recall from my training, locking the door and throwing away the key was 'plan B'," Alistair snorted shaking his head.

"Hello Greagoir," Railan said flatly.

"Well, look who is back. A proper Grey Warden now, are we? Glad you're not dead," the knight-commanders said sarcastically.

"You're looking well, yourself…if a bit harried," Railan retorted.

Alistair knew if this kept up they would get nowhere fast, but unlike with Carroll he was out of his element and didn't know where he could step in and help with this situation.

"Perhaps. Now, we're dealing with a situation that doesn't involve you, Grey Warden," Greagoir said turning his back on the group.

Railan looked as though he had just been slapped. Shocked the mage shouted, "This tower was my home. I want to know what's happened."

Greagoir turned back and looked less angry and more tired than he had a moment ago. "I'll speak plainly: The tower is no longer under our control. Abominations and demons stalk the tower's halls."

Railan gasped at this information. Alistair could understand how hard that was to hear. Going to Redcliffe had been the same for him. The thought of Redcliffe worried him as they may not be able to get help from the mages to save Connor and Isolde.

Greagoir shook his head and watched the mage, "We were too complacent. First Jowan, now this. Do not think I've forgotten your role in Jowan's escape."

Alistair was ready for the same reaction from Railan as he had seen outside, but the mage surprised him when he squared his shoulders and asked, "What can I do to help?"

"I have sent word to Denerim, calling for reinforcements and the Right of Annulment."

"How…how c-can you think of annulling the entire Circle?" Railan asked, the panic in his voice clear.

Alistair put a hand on the mage's shoulder, "The mages are probably already dead. Any abominations remaining in there must be dealt with no matter what." Railan looked at him with wide eyes. "I'm sorry," he said softly. He would never have made a good templar, since he didn't seem to have the hate for mages that seemed to be a requirement from these templars.

"This situation is dire. There is no alternative. Everything in the tower must be destroyed so it can be made safe again," Greagoir said solemnly.

"The mages are not defenseless. Some must still live," Railan said grasping at straws.

"If any are still alive, the Maker Himself has shielded them," Greagoir said shaking his head. No one could have survived those monstrous creatures. It is too painful to hope for survivors and find…nothing."

"I'll look for survivors," Railan stated hopefully. "I have to try. I can't ask you two to come with me, but this is something I have to do."

Alistair looked at Leliana and she shrugged. It looked like they would be following Railan on this mission even if it was fool hardy.

Leliana spoke up for the first time since they had come to the tower, "Of course we will be by your side. We must believe that the Maker is looking out for his children. It is the right thing to do."

"A word of caution," Greagoir sighed, "once you cross that threshold, there is no turning back. The great doors must remain barred. I will open them for no one until I have proof that it is safe. I will only believe it is over if the first enchanter stands before me and tells me it is so. If Irving has fallen, then the Circle is lost, and must be destroyed."

"Yeah, I understand that. If I go in there and Irving's dead so am I. I'm going to do your job for you and when it's done we're even personally, but you will owe the Grey Wardens," Railan said sharply.

Alistair watched as the grim determination settled in on the mage. He couldn't bring himself to tell Railan that this was a futile maneuver and wasting precious time that could be needed back at Redcliffe. Alistair also knew the treaty called for mages, but if they could take care of this then they would have either the mages or the templars by them n the battle against the Blight. They needed to stay and do this just as much as they needed to go.

Alistair moved quietly behind the mage as he was speaking to the quartermaster and getting supplies.

Once he was done, Alistair put a hand on the younger man's shoulder. "Rain, are you sure you want to do this?" Alistair asked and bit his lip. He had not intended to call the mage by the nickname he had thought up.

Alistair noticed that Railan looked at each templar that was in the front foyer as though he was looking for a specific person.

"I have to, Alistair," sadness crept into the mage's face, when he did not find who he was looking for. "I hate to drag you and Leli into this, but I'm not certain I can do this on my own."

"Of course we'll come and help you. You are our leader and we will follow wherever you lead us. We need to do this; it's what Grey Wardens do." Alistair smiled slightly and received a skeptical look in return but Railan did not disagree.

"What if I said that I was doing this for personal reasons?"

"I would be by your side no matter what. You've been there for me all this time doing whatever I asked now, Rain, let me be here for you," Alistair said sincerely. The warrior felt that he needed to comfort and protect his mage just like he had that night in Ostegar but that was what he was doing currently. The feeling confused him as he had never quite felt like this but he found he wasn't opposed to the feeling. He'd have to figure out what that meant later when he could think about it.

Railan nodded and the three of them started toward the huge doors that led to the rest of the tower. The two templars guarding them stood in their way. One looked over to where Greagoir was speaking with several others. Greagoir nodded and the templar opened the door, which groaned with the weight of the massive door. Railan led the way through as they entered a hallway that had looked scorched and smelled of burnt flesh.

Alistair looked down the hall to make sure it was clear before he ducked into the first room after Railan. Railan rummaged around in the wreckage a bit. He seemed to be looking for something in particular but he had not said anything yet. The mage grabbed a few scraps of paper and some supplies that the others mages who had lived there must have had.

Alistair could not help but feel a little helpless, as he followed the mage to the next room. He glanced over at Leliana and could tell that she felt similarly. They would need him to speak up at some point if they were going to be of any use.

After the mage went through the next room, they returned to the hallway.

"Those were the apprentice quarters. I grew up living in the second room," Railan finally said quietly.

Alistair could only nod but he sympathized with the mage. He had felt horrible going back to the castle and that had to be much the same as Railan was feeling.

As they moved down the hall, they did so cautiously as they didn't know what might be up ahead. Soon voices met their ears and the sound caused Railan to speed up. Alistair rushed to keep up with the mage letting Leliana keep an eye out behind them so that they would not be flanked by whatever might be lurking in the tower.

The hallway opened up into a large open room that had few doors leaving it. The one shimmered with a magical barrier. The other had stairs heading down to it. Alistair thought that might lead to the dungeon but who knew in a mage's tower. The voices had been a handful of mages and several children. They all seemed to be all right for the most part, but Alistair knew there was no way to know if they were blood mages so they would need to be cautious.

"Wynne, you are alright?" Railan asked and seemed to relax more than he had since they had landed on the island. "I never expected to see you."

"Or you, Railan, especially after Ostegar," the elder mage said concern showing on her kind features.

"Why have you returned to the tower?"

"We need the help of the mages, and I'm helping because this was my home. I want to see what's happened to it."

"I see you still care about the Circle. Unfortunately, the Circle is in grave danger."

"Yes, but most of all from the templars. They plan on annulling the Circle."

"So Greagoir thinks the Circle is beyond hope, he probably assumes we are all dead. Do they have the Right of Annulment?"

"No, but Greagoir expects it to arrive soon. We have to clean up this mess or he plans on using it, and we won't be able to stand against the Right," Railan said the worry creeping into his voice and the mage began to pace.

"Wynne can you tell us what happened here?" Alistair asked, hoping that the mage might fill them in on what could be expected in the tower.

"It began after Uldred returned from Ostagar. He led a revolt and tried to take over the Circle. As you can see it didn't work out as he had planned. I don't know what became of him but I am certain all this is his doing."

"I won't lose the Circle to one man's pride and stupidity," Railan growled in response. "Leave it to us, we'll save the mages."

"I wish to come with and help save the Circle," Wynne offered. "I will lower the barrier and we can enter the tower."

"Very well, then we should set off immediately."

Wynne raised her hand and spoke a few words of power that caused the barrier to ripple and disperse.

"Be prepared for anything. I do not know what manner of beasts lurk beyond this barrier."

Alistair found it unnerving that even the mages did not seem to know what they might find in the tower. He had expected them to at least have an idea. He let the two mages lead down the narrow hall.

Ahead there was a rustling sound. The two mages froze and Alistair pushed forward so that he could rush into the next room. When he saw the creatures that were there he took a step back startled at the look of the monsters. He pushed forward with a shout and attacked the nearest of the three. The creatures' moves were slow but they had abilities that they used. The mages and Leliana were able to stun and freeze the other two so he could handle them one at a time. The second broke from the ice that had held it and swung hitting Alistair squarely in the back. He flew forward running his blade through the first finishing it off and the moment slammed him into the bookshelf. Dazed he turned and brought his shield up to stop the next blow. He brought his sword up to prepare for his next attack, which never came. A bolt of lightning from Railan struck the creature setting it aflame and with a burst of flame that he just avoided behind his shield the being was gone just like the first. Alistair turned just in time to see Wynne and Leliana finish off the third.

Alistair looked over at Railan and between panting breaths said, "Thank you."

Railan smiled at him and shrugged. Then the mage did something that surprised him. Railan reached out a hand to him and while the younger man helped him to steady himself the mage placed a hand on his aching back. Alistair felt magic flow into him. It relieved the pain that was between his shoulder blades and he felt re-energized again.

When the mage lowered his hand he winked at Alistair, which caused the almost templar to blush, even though he did not fully know why he reacted that way. So Alistair changed the subject, "What were those?"

"Abominations," Wynne said plainly.

The next couple of rooms which looked like class rooms went much the same way. Alistair was becoming used to fighting the abominations. Using some of his templar abilities to block some of the magic that the creatures used. Alistair noticed that Railan stopped and knelt at each of the fallen templars they came across which seemed odd but he was too busy watching for the next attack to figure out what the mage was doing.

They turned to enter the large circular room and as they did, several abominations and black smoky creatures attacked.

"Alistair, demon behind you!" Railan warned.

Alistair turned and saw the largest of the smoky demons rushed at him and just as it would have hit Alistair the creature became still as a statue. While it was paralyzed Alistair took down a few of the abominations before turning and taking on the demon.

They took down the demon easily once the others where done.

Alistair knew his eyes were still wide when he went over to the man who had saved his life twice in the past hour. He put his hand on the mage's shoulder and said, "Thanks again."

"Don't worry about it, Alistair."

The group headed up the stairs to the next level in the tower. The door opened with a little force but then they found themselves in the middle of a large room. This like much of the tower looked scorched as though fire had crawled across the floor and up the walls. There was a slight sound from the back of the room, and Alistair pointed his sword in the direction of the noise.

"Please, refrain from going into the stockroom. It is a mess and I have not been able to get it into a state fit to be seen," a calm even voice greeted them levelly.

"Owain?" Railan asked.

"Yes. You remember," Owain replied in an eerily calm voice that reminded Alistair of some of the tranquil that ran shops for the chantry. "I was trying to tidy up as the stockroom is my responsibility. I must keep it clean."

"Owain why didn't you try to leave?" Wynne asked.

"I tried to, when things got quiet. That was when I encountered the barrier. Finding no other way out, I returned to work."

"Oh, Owain, you should have said something I would have opened the door for you," Wynne said.

"The stockroom is familiar. I prefer to be here."

"I'm glad you're all right, Owain," Railan commented.

"I would prefer not to die. I would prefer it if the tower returned to the way it was."

"Well we are working on doing that," Railan gave a small smile to the tranquil man.

"Perhaps you will find Niall and will succeed and save us all"

"What is Niall doing?"

"I do not know, but he came here with several others and took the Litany of Adralla."

"But that protects from mind domination," Wynne exclaimed.

"Is blood magic at work here?" Railan asked hurriedly.

"I do not know."

Wynne looked at Railan and explained, "Niall was in the meeting. He would know. I was afraid this might be blood magic."

"Don't worry Wynne, we can handle it."

"We should find Niall. The Litany will give us a fighting chance against any blood mages we encounter"

"I wish you luck. Perhaps this will be over soon," Owain said unperturbed by the discussion they just had. "I will stay here and sort the stockroom."

"Stay safe, Owain," Railan called back at the tranquil as he headed toward the next door.

Alistair noticed the determined way that the mage was leading, as though he now had even more resolve to beating back those who had harmed his home. The fast pace was stopped short when they came across a barrier.

Railan backtracked only a bit before he stopped and waited by the wall. He held up three fingers and pointed around the corner.

Alistair could hear what sounded like an argument going on in the next room. He nodded to the mage and charged into the room. He swung his sword at the mages. He tried to drain them of mana but he knew if they were blood mages that would not work. He heard the others start attacking too. The mages went down quickly.

The last one was a woman who was kneeling on the ground. Alistair was ready to land a final blow when Railan caught his arm and stepped in front of him.

"Malli?" Railan asked softly.

"Please, Railan, please," the young blood mage sobbed, "if you spare me I… I could escape and seek penance at the Chantry."

The rest of the group stood back from the woman. Alistair watched carefully as Railan stepped nearer to her and went down on one knee looking her in the eye.

Alistair could not help the comment that spilled from his lips. "You know they'll never take you," Alistair snorted. "They're very picky about who they let in. Harlots, murderers, yes. Maleficarum, oh no."

Leliana sighed and shook her head, "Your comments betray your ignorance, Alistair. The Chantry accepts all, regardless of what they've done."

"Well, it seems you're familiar with a whole other Chantry, because the one I know wouldn't hesitate to shove a sword of mercy right through her heart."

"Shut up, both of you!" Railan snapped at them over his shoulder. The mage turned back to the woman and asked, "Why should I help a blood mage? I don't sympathize with your kind."

Alistair jumped a bit at the harsh tone in the mage's voice. His eyes went wide when his fellow Warden took a dagger out from the folds of his robes and sunk it in the blood mages side. The poor woman gurgled and collapsed to the floor. The mage wiped the blade before hiding it back in his robes. Alistair was surprised to see tears in the other man's eyes. He must have known the other mage. Most of the people they had come across were people that the younger man had known in some way. He wondered if the other mages had recognized Railan. If they had, they gave no indication before they had attacked.

He caught Wynne's eye for a moment and she shook her head sadly. She stepped close to him and whispered, "We both knew them. You were more right than you know. She would never have been let out. If anything Greagior would have tortured her and made her an example to the rest of us."

"He would be so cruel?" asked Alistair.

"He wasn't always that way but the problem here has betrayed what little trust he may have had for us. I think you will understand as we go farther into the tower. At least what Railan did was merciful."

While they had spoken, Railan grabbed a few more scraps of paper and took a couple of books from the shelf before going to where the magical barrier had stood only moments before.

When Alistair neared the mage he could not help but notice the tears that were welled up in the younger man's eyes. Their eyes met for a only a moment but in that time Alistair understood that as Railan was trying to harden himself, so that he could do what needed to be done, every action was still painfully reaching his heart. Railan turned away and when he looked back Alistair, the templar saw the resolute mask was back in place.

Alistair surprised himself that he was glad to see that the mage was still a soft kind person even after everything that they were going through. Even more than that Alistair found himself wishing he could take the pain for Railan.

When they moved on ward to the third floor they found it in much the same condition. Alistair was beginning to get used to how the battles were going, and he wasn't being surprised as much as those first couple fights. They continued to clear out all the abominations, undead, and demons. They worked around the tower till they reached the center room which held the stairs up to the fourth floor.

They quickly went up, but when they went through the door, they were greeted by a horrendous demon. The beast spoke slowly as if tired but every word was clear.

"Oh, look. Visitors. I'd entertain you but there is far too effort involved," the demon huffed.

"Killing demons is enough entertainment for me, thanks," Railan replied.

Alistair began to feel a fuzzy warmth surround him and the conversation seemed to be happening far away.

"But why? Aren't you tired," it purred, "of all the violence in the world? Wouldn't you like to just lay down and forget about all this?"

He knew he shouldn't listen to the words it spoke but his body was fighting him as he suddenly was aware of how tired he really was.

"I can't…keep eyes open. Someone … pinch me," Alistair mumbled.

Leliana bent over bracing herself on her knees, "I'll not listen to your lies, demon. You have no power over me." Alistair noticed that her accent seemed to thicken as she tired.

"Resist," Wynne said holding her head. The two mages seemed less effected but even they were wavering. "You must resist, or else we are all lost."

"Why do you bother fighting? You deserve a rest," the demon insisted.

Alistair fell to his knees and saw the others collapse too. As Alistair's eyes began to flutter shut, his last thought was that of the fact that it smelled like rain. Railan will get cold in the rain without extra blankets, he thought. His head lolled to the side and he was out.


	8. The Fade

Railan looked around himself and it took a bit for him to realize where he was. Damn it, he thought, the Fade, the dimension I wanted to be in just not the right location. Well the damn demon put me here, there has to be a way out then.

He stalked down a hall; this was nowhere he had been before. The walls were white and even the hallway seemed of grand architecture, but even as he moved about he did not recognize where he was supposed to be. Poor excuse for a sloth demon, he thought, if he cannot even get the setting correct to keep the individual happy.

From what he knew from books about sloth demons they usually tried to spin a web from memories to keep the victim ensnared. This place was not from his memories, so the illusion did not work on him and now all he needed to do was find the right door that would allow him to leave. His previous time in the Fade during his harrowing taught him that a door was not always a door.

As Railan made his way down the white hallway he began to make out an individual standing at the end of it. When he was closer he recognized that the person was Duncan. Confusion began to fog Railan's thoughts. Was this real, it couldn't be but maybe this was. Railan's thoughts were spinning and he was questioning if his earlier belief was actually wrong.

Duncan turned to him and spoke, "Ah, there you are. I'm not disturbing you, am I?"

Railan blinked repeatedly, "I can't quite remember what I was doing."

"I'm sure you were simply deep in thought. You've been at Weisshaupt for some time now. Do you like it here?"

The mage's brow was furrowed, Weisshaupt, he thought. How did I get here? No! This wasn't real. The tower, have to remember the tower. But maybe that was all in the past.

"Something doesn't seem right," Railan mumbled and was surprised when the words came out loud.

"Everything is as it should be. We have eradicated the darkspawn, and the world is at peace."

"We eradicated the darkspawn?" Railan asked without really thinking. The memories of the Blight were coming back to him. The details were fuzzy but he remembered the battles.

"It was a triumph for all of us, bringing down the archdemon and setting the underground lairs ablaze."

How could all the darkspawn be eliminated, he was questioning to himself when another question suddenly came to mind and he asked without thinking, "Where's Alistair?"

"We were all saddened at his loss. You must be confused by all this. The healers said that your memories would be difficult because of your injuries."

Railan began panting, Alistair was dead. He felt his chest contract at the thought; he doubled over trying to wrap his mind around the sudden loss of the warden. He wasn't sure if he could continue without his templar. He needed the other man. They had been through so much together and the idea that he would never see him again caused him to despair.

No, this wasn't right he needed to focus. He knew Alistair was alive but he needed to help him if he was to keep him that way. Railan needed more information if he was going to save his companions. He figured playing along would be the best way to stay in control of the situation for now. He stood back up slowly.

"If the darkspawn are gone, then we are no longer needed."

"The Grey Wardens shall be keepers of history. We shall tell tales and sing songs of a more tumultuous time, that way others may rejoice in knowing that those times are past," Duncan said jubilantly.

"I never thought that was what the Grey Wardens were," commented Railan. "I never thought Grey Wardens would just sit around. What a waste."

"And what is it that you think the Grey Wardens should be doing?"

Railan pondered that for a bit, "The darkspawn are not gone, and to ignore them is irresponsible."

"Foolish mage, I have given you so much and you cast it back in my face," Duncan's voice changed and reverberated just like the demon's had. "It seems only war and death will satisfy you."

The vision of Duncan drew his swords and readied to attack Railan.

Railan's mind snapped clear like it had when he first awoke in the Fade. He saw through the vision and saw the lesser demon the sloth had implored to do its bidding.

He began casting spells as quickly as he could and finished off the demon that had taken on Duncan's form. When the demon was gone a portal appeared in its place and seemed to be the door he had been looking for.

Railan moved to the next fade dimension. He studied his surroundings for a moment. He could sense other presences around him and with him in the Fade. He moved forward cautiously. The Fade rippled around him and he began to sense a darkness moving with him. The mage could not tell what that might be but he had few choices except to continue moving forward.

For the time being he let the other presences guide him along. His instincts were right when they lead him to Niall. The other mage looked confused and was muttering.

As Railan came up to Niall, the other mage looked at him but there was no recollection in his face. "Niall," he said cautiously, uncertain himself if it was a figment he was facing.

"I can't get out you know that right," Niall said flatly. "There is no way out."

"I'm sure there is, Niall. We just have to have hope and try to find the demon."

"I can't go. I've tried to find a way out, but there is no way for me to get out."

"I have to try. I'm not the only one trapped here, I have to try for hi-them," Railan said catching himself focusing on Alistair when he should be thinking about all his companions.

Niall sighed turning away and looking off into the distance. Railan had to move on; he would try to help the other mage once this was all over but for now he needed to get to the demon.

The demon had already showed signs of mistake all Railan needed to do was find another one and he could get all of them out of the Fade. He wandered for a while but no sign of a door or passage. Before too long he was back where he started in front of Niall. He had made one big circle. He must be missing something, he thought. He had to look at things differently. For lack of any better idea, he cast a quick spell causing snow to fall in front of him.

As the snow fell to the ground Railan began to notice dips and hills that he had not seen the first time. He came closer to one of the hills and felt a wave of magic wash through him. The power was different than any he had encountered in the Fade before. Part of him that had grown up following the towers teaching told him to leave this power alone and not to mess with things in the Fade that were unknown; but the other part of him that had adapted to being a Grey Warden and living outside the tower was curious. This may be the only way out, he told himself. He had to check it out for the sake of his companions and all those trapped in the tower.

When Railan was close enough to touch the hill the magic spiked, dropping him to his knees. While on his knees he noticed that there was an opening. This was a mouse hole. It wasn't the door he was looking for but he would find a way to use it. He reached out his fingers forcing through the magic that was kept there. He felt the magic slither into him and when his fingers were just about to touch the passage he noticed his hand had transformed. He continued to move closer and again the magic coursed within him; he felt himself shrinking and changing. After a moment the magic subsided a little and he realized he had become a mouse.

Scurrying Railan made his way through the opening. On the other side it looked much the same but from his perspective it was easier to see the openings. He ran on his little mouse legs from hole to hole till one openning let out to what looked like a lake.

Railan felt himself changing back. He tried to hold on to the magic that had let him become a mouse but it slipped away. Frowning he took in his suroundings and was surprised to see a desire demon watching him.

"Interesting little one," she cooed at him. "That is some trick you have. I would be quite interested in making a trade with you. Something you truely desire in exchange for that ability."

"I don't make deals with demons," Railan said bluntly. He turned away from the demon.

"Oh? Not even if it means having the one you love?"

Still with his back to her, Railan furrowed his brow trying to decipher what she meant. He fought the urge to turn around and question her about it.

"Confused, are you?" she purred. "I would have thought by now you would know what it was you truly desired. He is quite magnificent. Maybe you can still find him… maybe even save him… maybe he won't turn you away if you tell him you love him. But only I can guarantee these things."

"I will not make a deal with you," Railan said as he gathered some of his magic and turning let loose lightening at the demon. His anger toward the demon and her words fueled his abilities and it didn't take long for the demon to fall shattering into pieces.

A Fade portal opened where the demon had been standing. So the doors were being guarded by demons. Of course he would keep his eyes out for demons but unlike previous times in the Fade he would be seeking the demons out.

In the new Fade dimension, he recognized some of the artificial landscape as that of the tower but it was twisted and changed. The first couple of rooms had mouse holes which he found he was able to transform into the mouse to get through to the next room.

However, at the end of the hall Railan came upon a fire barrier.

The barrier was frusterating because he knew he had not seen any other passage ways while he was a mouse. He stepped nearer to the flames and found it odd that even as close as he was he didn't feel any heat coming from them. What he did feel was the surge of magical power like he had the first time he encountered the mouse hole. Less cautious than before he pushed closer to the barrier letting the power surround him.

The out come of the exposure to the magic surprised Railan as he took in the changes. His skin was covered in flames and he felt a strong pull toward the fire spells that he had never felt as connected to in comparison to the lightening he was so fond of.

In the new form he walked through the wall of fire. He continued on passing through several other fire barriers. He defended himself against attacks by flaming Templars and hounds. As he went he was becoming more confident with his fire spells.

After passing through fire into a couple other rooms Railan came to a large room that seemed to be a dead end. As he entered the room a larger rage demon arose from the ground.

Railan still in the fire form quickly threw a fire ball at the demon and followed that with a flame wave. Neither of the attacks worked on the demon as it slowly moved toward the mage. Thinking quickly he moved backward concentrating on changing back to himself; up till this point the changes had been automatic so he hoped he could control this ability. The transformation startled the demon for only a second as it paused momentarily before continuing on.

Railan knew he would be vulnerable to the rage demons fire attacks in this form but he also had spells now that could actually damage the creature. He cast an ice spell that struck the demon slowing it but not stopping it. Another frost blast did a great deal of damage, but still the creature closed the distance between them. The mage shot off a few quick arcane bolts at the demon backing away trying to keep some distance from the demon. He pulled a great deal of mana forth and let loose magical ice that slowly encased the demon from the ground till it reached the top. The next blasted shattered the demon. The shards disappeared but in their place was the next portal.

Through the next portal Railan again recognized the areas as parts of the tower, but twisted so the rooms were not as they should be. Slowly he moved around the curved hallway. What surprised him was that he didn't come across any visible barriers in this realm.

The mage moved to a door way that in the tower would have lead up the stairs to the harrowing chamber. He opened the door to find it was just a door. The stairs lead down and had another door at the base. He moved down the stairs cautiously. Again the door at the bottom was just a door, not a magical barrier.

The room at the bottom was circular room that had a large pillar in the center, with two halls leading at right angles from the one with the stairs. He went right first the hallway was dark and empty and also a dead end, so Railan went back to the main room.

As he crossed the room he noticed a huge stone carving. Unexpectedly the stone giant threw a boulder at Railan. Luckily it just glanced off him, but the force was still enough to push the mage back against the wall. He hit the wall and slumped down. He was exhausted but he could sense he was close to finding a way out. The pull of the dark forces were nearer now than they had been before. All he had to do was get past the golems.

The creature threw another boulder. This one struck the wall next to Railan. The rock cracked showing geode crystals within the structure. He dodged another rock while grabbing the cracked one and moving around to the hallway he had just come from.

Looking at the rock he impulsively forced his hands into the crack and using some force to split the rock in half. The gems within sparkled with magical energy. The power wasn't the same as the magical barriers but Railan was hoping it might have a similar result.

The magic rushed into him so quickly he dropped the stone which shattered like glass at his feet. As he had expected the transformation began, but unlike the previous forms this transformation was sharp and painful.

Excruciatingly painful, he thought as a scream escaped his lips. Even while being attacked he had never felt anything like this pain within the Fade. He felt his skin rip apart while his muscles seized up, causing him to thrash on the ground. His heart and lungs slowed and he was sure he was going to die.

I failed, he thought, this was a trap and now I failed them all.

The darkness was beginning to surround his vision, and for a moment he felt another presence with him in the Fade. It seemed so familiar and was tugging at his mind keeping him from slipping into the peaceful blackness. He clung to that presence while the pain continued to rake through him. He felt warmth and love but he could not place where he knew the other being from.

Just as suddenly as the pain began, it stopped. With the agony gone, he noticed that the presence that had pulled him through was also gone.

Railan stood up stiffly, his joints grinding as he moved. He looked down to see if he was injured and was shocked at what he saw. His body had turned to stone. There were crystals protruding from him and he could feel the magic pouring into him from the gems. The power was incredible but very different from the other forms he had encountered. He could still tell that he was himself under the magical stone. He could feel all his regular spells they were just intensified… extremely intensified.

Without much thought he moved back to the door way of the main room. The stone golem was still there but no longer throwing boulders. He made his way cautiously across the room but the giant had become a statue once again. Railan would have frowned at that but found he couldn't move the finer muscles in his face. Perhaps that was a similar barrier as the previous realms, he thought. He continued down the other hall, which lead to another room.

This room had two of the stone guardians on either side and another door on the far side. Not giving much thought to the statues Railan continued heading to the door. Half way both guardians came to life lumbering toward the startled mage.

The one on the right lobbed a boulder at Railan. Acting on instinct the mage forced an arcane blast at the rock sending it back in the direction it had just come from. The blast had more force than had expected sending the guardian sliding back a few feet. While that one was back, he shot ice at it freezing the stone for the time being.

The other guardian had come near enough to Railan to punch a stone fist at him. Railan braced against what he expected could be a near fatal blow but without enough time to cast a spell he put an arm up to shield his head. The stone creature struck but the result was incredible. Railan's skin which was also stone shook from the force but it was the guardian's arm that shattered. Reorganizing his thoughts quickly Railan cast a frost spell at the damaged guardian. The cold air making the stone brittle, so he followed with a lightening spell, which shattered the guardian.

Returning his attention to the remaining guardian, he was surprised to see it was still frozen. Railan called forth a wave of lightening that tore through the creature with ease shredding it into dust.

Railan was shocked at how easy that had gone. By far this crystal form was far more powerful than any of the magic he had encountered in the Fade so far. It was certainly not the sloth demon's doing. He wondered once more about the other presence he had felt. Could someone else be trapped here and why would they be helping him but not showing themselves. He couldn't ponder that too long and would need to continue forward before it was too late for them to survive their trip to the tower.

The next door led to a large rectangular room. Even though the walls looked like that of the tower, Railan could not place the room. He walked in, noticing that there were no other exits. Another dead end, he thought turning to leave. That was when he noticed the enormous ogre that he had missed by the door as he headed in.

A massive arm from the ogre swung striking Railan's stone chest with enough power to fling him across the room. The mage struck the far wall and shaking his head stood up. He was surprised that the blow hadn't stunned or injured him more. It must be this form, he thought. But before he could contemplate that more the ogre charged. The distance gave Railan enough time to side step, avoiding the beast.

Thinking quickly as the creature struck the wall, the mage struck it with a blast of fire. He stepped back and shielded himself as parts of the wall and ceiling crumbled down from the force. Railan let loose a few quick arcane bolts followed by a flow of ice in front of him. The ogre roared in pain and chased the mage stepping on the ice and sliding about. As the beast fell, Railan finished the fight with a fireball directly at the ogre.

Another portal appeared where the creature had fallen. Stepping through Railan braced himself for the magical summersaults that he knew would come.

When Railan's vision cleared he could see his companions deep in sleep. They must be in their own sloth created worlds, he thought. He stepped up to Wynne first and resting a hand which was still stone he cast a healing spell which spread through the older mage, waking her. Though as she awoke her form shimmered and disappeared. Railan could still sense Wynne so he didn't fear too much about what happened. He hoped that she had awoken outside the Fade.

Next he went to Leliana and performed the same spell waking her only to have her disappear too.

Lastly, the mage stepped forward to Alistair. Smiling to himself, he watched the almost templar sleep. Alistair looked so peaceful, and Railan gave himself just a moment to enjoy what he saw knowing that once awake he would not have such an opportunity again. Reluctantly Railan cast the spell to wake the sleeping warrior. He smiled again as Alistair's eyes fluttered open.

"Railan?" the almost templar whispered before vanishing.

Now all Railan had to do was to deal with the sloth demon and leave the Fade. Both of those tasks easier said than done, he thought.

Just past where his companions had been was a large tree and as Railan moved near it, the Fade realm shifted and changed uneasily. His surroundings changed to that of the room in the center of the tower where they had encountered the sloth demon but the mage knew that he was still in the Fade.

The sloth demon was before him once again just as he had been before he pulled them into the Fade. Railan kept his focus on the demon and used his peripheral vision to see his companions reentering the room from the sides.

"Why are we back here?" Alistair asked.

"We're still in the Fade," Railan said bluntly although inside he was grateful he wouldn't have to face the demon on his own.

"Ahhh, you are the one disrupting my realm," the sloth demon said slowly. Sluggishly the creature pulled itself up. "You seem to have changed since I forced you to sleep."

Railan looked down at himself and realized he was still stone and crystal. His companions didn't seem to notice but the fact that the portal hadn't changed him back concerned him, but this could be useful none the less.

Once the others got closer to Railan, he whispered to them, "I'm going to engage the demon directly-"

"No," Alistair interrupted, "you can't. He will rip you to pieces."

"Alistair, please trust me," Railan said finally looking away from the demon to meet Alistair's eyes. The warrior looked so concerned but his companions didn't know about how he changed during his time in the Fade. "Let me engage him first that way he'll target me and you can attack from behind. Leli and Wynne ranged attacks would be appreciated but not too much as to draw his attention away from me."

"I so hate the effort of fighting," began the sloth demon, "but it may be necessary, to keep the peace of my realm. So little fly, come here to get squashed."

"Your time has come to an end demon, I won't go down that easy," Railan shouted charging at the beast.

The fighting became a crazy whirl of color as Railan shot spell after spell at the demon. Each spell Railan cast struck true forcing the creature to give ground when the mage got too near. He knew his companions were aiding him, but his focus was solely on keeping the demon's attention.

Occasionally when the demon was cornered he would give off a magical burst that would send Railan and Alistair, the two who were nearest him flying back away from him. Railan would bounce right back from those blows, because of his crystal form, and continuing to attack the demon. At one point the demon made a sweeping attack at the warrior as he was getting up from a blast; Railan saw what was happening and quickly moved to block the blow, which glanced off his stone skin screeching loudly.

Railan saw the confused look on Alistair's face, before he continued with his barrage of attacks. The demon was slowly weakening as the realm seemed to shimmer and lose focus for a few seconds at a time. The fight was too much for the demon while keeping the realm in place. Railan felt his mana ebbing as the fight drug on, but every time it became too low the crystals in his skin glowed replenishing his reserve of mana.

The demon stumbled backward, continuing to weaken until with a final blast from Railan, he shattered. The demon had dissipated being removed from the Fade permanently. The final Fade portal became visible where Sloth had been.

In the aftermath of the battle Niall stepped into the room, before the others went to the portal.

"You defeated the demon. I'm sorry I doubted you. I just never expected that anyone could do that," Niall said.

"Niall, we need to leave. We need to clear out the rest of the tower," said Railan.

The other mage nodded, "Take the Litany from my body. It will help you succeed."

"Your body? No, you are coming with, everything will be alright."

"I'm sorry, my friend, I've been here far longer than you have. For you it will have been only a few hours of sleep. Your body won't have wasted away in the real world."

"We can heal you, you're not dead yet."

"Very close though, every minute I was here the sloth demon was feeding off me. It used my life to fuel the nightmares of this realm. I was never meant to save the Circle, or even survive this," Niall explained sadly.

Railan felt sick. He went through all that and he was not even able to save Niall.

Niall must have seen the look on Railan face and said, "I do not fear what may come. They say we return to the Maker in death, and that isn't such a terrible thing."

"Thank you for what you've done. Your sacrifice won't be forgotten," Alistair said sadly gently putting a hand on Railan's shoulder guiding him to the portal.

When they went through the portal, the glaring light of the Fade dimmed and the party found themselves waking up in the tower once more.


	9. Of Templars and Demons

Exiting the Fade was no easier than entering it. Blood surged in Railan's head as he blinked his eyes rapidly. The events in the Fade came crashing back to him, making his stomach churn. Sitting up suddenly, Railan clutched his side and then scrambled to his feet. Staggering he headed to the far wall and grasped at the cold stone to support himself as he heaved dryly. He shook uncontrollably and realized that it had been nearly a day since he had eaten anything. Tears stung his eyes once more and his breathing was ragged. The desire to be strong was losing quickly. So many dead, how could he continue with so much destruction and they still did not know what might be before them.

Once he could find his voice, he stammered, "W-Wynne, p-please, can you get the L-litany?"

Alistair leaned against the wall next to where Railan braced himself. Railain kept his eyes on the ground and tried with every bit of strength to keep control of his emotions. He had thought he had nothing more to lose when he came back to the tower. However, the farther they went through the tower the more he lost. Railan was not sure how much more he could withstand.

Alistair handed a water skin to him. Railan took it from the almost templar. His breath shook as he raised the skin to his lips and took a large swallow. He handed the container back to Alistair. The warrior then handed him a piece of dried venison. Railan smiled just slightly even though it did not reach his eyes. Railan thought it was strange that Alistair seemed to know just what he needed. He was grateful for the other man's care. Except while in the Fade, Alistair had been taking care of him since they first met. At some point he hoped he would be able to repay his kindness.

Railan took a bite of the meat, and his stomach threatened to twist into a knot. He swallowed down the bite and took another forcing himself to eat. When he was done he stood straight again and pushed off the wall.

He looked into Alistair's concerned eyes and whispered, "Thank you." He turned and walked farther into the room, "We should continue on. Wynne, Leli, how are you both doing."

"I am alright though I may not sleep easily for some time," Lelianna responded.

"I'm okay, but we need to stop Uldred," Wynne commented.

"Then which way do we go, Wynne," Railan said shrugging. Railan had only been up this far in the tower once before on his way up to his harrowing.

Wynne led them down a hallway and through a couple of deserted rooms. Railan stopped at each fallen templar. He looked into each face said a silent prayer to the Maker and moved on. The third room they came upon wasn't empty.

Railan peeked in and saw a desire demon and a bewitched templar. He frowned as he recognized the templar who was under the demons control. Drass. The demon seemed to be playing house with the templar.

When Railan entered the room the demon turned to look at him, but Railan ignored her at first. "Ser Drass!" he called out, but the templar seemed not to hear him.

"My darling, the children have finished supper, tuck them into bed while I see who is at the door," the demon purred.

"Don't be long, love," Drass replied, "the children will want to kiss you good night."

"I will be but a moment," she said before turning to the new comers. "You are intruding upon a loving moment and I dislike disruptions."

"And I dislike demons," Railan spat. "We're not dolls for you to play with, and now you'll die."

Drass seemed to realize there was something wrong and came to the demon's side but still he didn't see the others, until the demon shrieked, "Bandits, they are here to kill us and the children."

Railan's shoulders slumped, but he knew what he had to do. He called forth his magic and lit the templar up in lightning. The man cried out as he was enveloped in the powerful electrical currents that were amplified by his armor. When he released the magic, the man crumpled to the ground.

The other three had taken down the demon with little difficulty. It had seemed that she had depended far too much on the templar to protect her.

"His name was Drass. The demon preyed on his longing to have a family. At least he had a chance to have a taste of that before the end," Railan said softly.

The group moved down the hall, till they came to a locked door. They could hear someone speaking on the other side. The group prepared themselves for what could be the next battle, as Lelianna picked the lock nimbly.

They rushed into the room, and Railan was both shocked and relieved when he saw a lone templar kneeling in the back corner in prayer. Railan hurried forward only to be stopped by a magic field.

"Cullen?"

"This trick again? I know what you are. It won't work. I will stay strong…" the templar broke off and continued the prayer he had been repeating.

"Cullen, please recognize me? Please it's me."

"Of course I recognize you…they must have delved so far into my thoughts…"

"The boy is exhausted and this cage," Wynne spoke quietly so that she would not upset Cullen further, "I've never seen anything like."

"Cullen, please listen, we're here to help," Railan said kneeling down so that he was at the same level as the templar.

Cullen shook his head and shouted, "Enough visions. If anything in you is human… please, kill me know and stop this game." His next words were so quiet Railan nearly missed them, "You broke the others, but I will stay strong, for my sake…for theirs." His words were fragmented but still Railan caught them. "Sifting through my thoughts…tempting me with the one thing I always wanted but could never have…Using my shame against me…my ill-advised infatuation with him… and a mage of all things."

Railan's eyes widened with shock at his words. The templar's words may have been half crazed but if they were even partly true. Could Cullen really mean? Railan shook those thoughts from his head. Now was not the time for wondering about the past.

"I am so tired of these cruel jokes…these tricks…these…" the templar sobbed.

"He's delirious. He's been tortured, and has probably been denied food and water. I can tell." Lelianna added trying to help, "Here I have a skin of-"

"Don't touch me! Stay away!" Cullen yelled while scrambling back from the barrier. "Filthy blood mages, get out! Get out of my head! Maker help me I will not break…please, I'd rather die."

Railan couldn't say anything for a while. He could only imagine how terrible this experience had been on Cullen. And to find out that the demons used him to try and break his friend.

"You're not going to die, not if I can help it. You are so strong please understand that I am real. I am here," Railan said gently.

"Silence! I'll not listen to anything you say, demon," Cullen snapped, "Now be gone!"

Railan had jerked back as though he had been slapped. The man who had been a friend just called him a demon.

"You're…You're still here," the templar said confused. "That's always worked before. I close my eyes, but you are still here when I open them."

Railan was still on his knees in front to the trapped templar. He looked into the others face and said, "Please, Cullen, I'm really here. I can help you."

"Don't blame me for being cautious. The voices…the images… they were so real," Cullen said holding his head. "Why have you returned to the tower? How did you survive?"

Railan smiled sadly, "Greagoir told me what happened; I knew I had to help. The tower had been my home."

"As it was mine, but look what they've done to it. They deserve to die. Uldred most of all. You have to kill them for what they've done."

Railan swallowed and nodded.

Cullen shook his head, "Please they caged us like animals…looked for ways to break us. I'm the only one left."

"At least you survived," Railan whispered.

"I'm still not sure that I did," Cullen shrugged. "They turned some into monsters and there was nothing I could do."

"Uldred will pay for what he's done."

"And to think I once thought we were too hard on you," the templar snarled, his hatred clear in his eyes.

"Please I know you don't mean that. We're not all evil, Cullen."

"Don't try to tell me what I think," Cullen shouted back. "Only mages have that much power at their fingertips. You more than anyone know that to be true. Only mages, not anybody else, just mages are so susceptible to the whisperings of the demons."

Wynne having had enough of this spoke up, "This is a discussion for another time! Irving and the other mages who fought Uldred, where are they?"

Cullen glared at the elder mage, "They were taken to the Harrowing Chamber. The sounds coming out from there… oh, Maker, the horrible sounds." Cullen closed his eyes and held his head at the painful memories.

"We must hurry," Wynne said to Railan. "They are in grave danger, I am sure of it."

"You can't save them!" Cullen stood and shouted. "You don't know what they've become."

Railan stood and looked at the templar, "I have to try. If nothing else we have to go and stop Uldred. If we don't Greagior will use the Right of Annulment on the tower."

"The Knight-Commander should invoke the Right as soon as he can," snarled the templar.

Railan backed up from the barrier hurt by the words his friend said. He whispered, "Remember I am a mage too, Cullen. Would you have them kill me as well."

The templar seemed to realize he had hurt the other but could only shake his head sadly, "You haven't been up there, you can't go up there. You haven't been under their influence, but you could be controlled just like them. The others have been surrounded by blood mages, who could corrupt them easily. They will corrupt you, too." Railan leaned forward as the templar's voice faded to a whisper, "Please don't make me kill you, too."

Shocked by the words Railan jumped back. He continued backing up until he bumped into Alistair. His almost templar put a hand on his arm to steady him and spoke softly, "His hatred of mages is so intense. The memory of his friends' deaths is still fresh in his mind."

"You have to end it, now, before it's too late," Cullen pleaded.

"I need to save anyone I can possibly save," Railan said flatly.

Cullen pounded his fist on the barrier and shouted, "Are you really saving anyone by taking this risk? I'm just willing to see the painful truth, which you seem content to ignore."

"You think I'm ignoring the truth," Railan couldn't help himself from snarling back, because of all the pain he had endured during that day. "We've just had to clear out the rest of the tower. You don't think it's been hard killing those who I had known before because they were either possessed or using blood magic. That's the truth. You think you have been the only one watching others die because of these events."

Railan noticed that Cullen's mood kept shifting from one extreme to another, but he wasn't helping with his mood swings either. He wanted to free the other man to help the templar who had once been a friend. But right now there seemed to be little way to do that safely. There was no guarantee that if freed he wouldn't run Railan through just for the fact that he was a mage.

"To ensure this horror is ended," Cullen continued calmer, "you must kill everyone up there. You cannot tell maleficarum by sight."

"I need to see for myself, but I will take what you said into consideration," Railan said trying to be diplomatic and keep the templar calmer.

"No one ever listens, not until it's far too late," the templar admonished. "Maker turn his gaze on you. I hope your compassion hasn't doomed us all, Mage." The last word was said as though it were a curse.

"Stay safe, Cullen," Railan said quietly, "We hopefully will be back shortly."

Railan walked to the stairs that lead to the harrowing chamber. A sense of foreboding settled deep into him. The last time he had entered this room he had been an apprentice. He didn't know which frightened him more going here for his harrowing which the challenge had been unknown at the time or going to fight malificars and demons.

When he pushed the door open it groaned but the occupants were distracted near the middle of the circular room. Uldred was torturing another circle mage using blood magic on the victim. Seeing this Railan rushed forward shouting incoherently. He hit a barrier that made him stager back stumbling into Alistair's arms. The warrior steadied him and they shared a look before focusing on the blood mage.

"Just a moment," cackled Uldred, "I will be with you in just a moment."

Railan tried to break through the barrier with some spells, but he didn't want to use up all of his power when he might have need of every extra bit of energy later to take down Uldred. He couldn't just stand there and wait, watching while a fellow mage was being drained and murdered in front of him. He growled his frustration. He was beginning to understand what Cullen had been saying.

Uldred drained the mage letting him fall dead to the ground. Railan took a couple of steps back quickly as he recognized Alim one of the elf mages who was only a few years older than himself. He saw Alistair watching him, the almost templar's surprise and curiosity by his reaction evident on his face.

Railan whispered to Wynne while Uldred was still distracted behind the barrier, "Stay back. We can't let him get close to either of us." Railan cautiously took a step closer to Alistair and Leliana. He knew he looked as frightened as he felt as he spoke quickly, "You two will need to keep him away from all of the mages. If he gets to any of us we can either fall under his control of worse he could drain us to gain more strength himself."

Alistair and Leliana both nodded. Alistair slowly took a couple of steps nearer to the barrier, while Leliana moved to the side closer to the captive mages.

Uldred drunk with extra power from the murdered mage, turned toward the new comers, "Ah fresh meat, glad you could join us." His voice came out in a dual demonic tone. "Heh, Heh, Wardens. I am glad you survived Ostegar," he said staring at Railan, licking his lips. "I shall certainly enjoy the power I will gain from you, as I already know your answer about joining me."

Railan felt the barrier dissipate and was knocked to his knees by the power Uldred exuded. Wynne crumpled to the ground, too. The demon mage moved closer to the stunned pair of mages.

Alistair used the distraction of the mages to his advantage attacking with his shield out front to deflect any spell the demon may use at him. The warrior crashed into Uldred both of them scattering away from the mages, but closer to where Irving lie unconscious.

Seeing this Railan pulled himself up and thinking quickly he used the Litany to created a protective shield around Irving. There, he thought, at least one less thing to worry. They needed The first enchanter to be alright in order to pacify Gregior.

Uldred became enraged by this and charged at Railan. Before the demon could reach him, three arrows whistled through the air striking Uldred in the chest. As the blood mage staggered back Alistair struck him with his shield again followed by a slash to the mage's knees. As he fell to the stone floor, Leliana let another arrow loose, this one hitting Uldred in the head killing him, before he could heal himself.

With the threat of Uldred and the demon within him passed Railan slowly stood up. He first turned to Wynne helping her to her feet. He then made his way to the other imprisoned mages lowering the barrier that surrounded them. Next he went to Irving and using the Litany lowered the barrier protecting the first enchanter. Quickly he cast a healing spell helping the elder mage.

Irving blinked a few timed focusing on Railan, "Ah it is good to see you again."

Railan helped the first enchanter to stand draping one arm over his shoulders. Alistair came over and did the same on the other side helping as well.

The trio moved toward the door slowly. Alistair said softly, "We should let Gregoir know that this is over."

Railan looked back and saw Leliana and Wynne helping the other mages and knew they would follow shortly. He found himself struggling to find words as he felt so useless after the fight with Uldred so he nodded his agreement. He remained silent as they went down the stairs, but noticed that the cage holding Cullen was down and the templar was nowhere in sight. He hoped the other man was alright, but stayed focused on making their way back down the tower.

Irving made small comments about the destruction in the tower as they went. At least with his survival there would be a tower to recover.

When they reached the main floor just outside the foyer they knocked on the door and Irving shouted to the templars on the other side, "Gregior, open up."

Hearing the first enchanter's voice the templars quickly opened the massive doors. Gregior was standing there staring at them critically.

"Yes, Gregior it is really me old friend, and these young folks here saved the tower," Irving said while lowering his arms to stand on his own. The elder mage stepped forward and shook hands with the knight commander.

"It is good to see you well, Irving," returned Gregior.

"First Enchanter," Railan finally spoke quietly, "I hate to bother you so soon, but we originally came to the tower for a couple of reasons."

Irving nodded and smiled his same kind, understanding smile he always gave, "Go on little one."

Railan blushed feeling like a little apprentice again, "We came from Redcliffe, and are in need of some mages and lyrium to destroy a demon that is at the castle." Railan knew he wasn't telling the whole story but with the templars here he didn't want them to become agitated by what they really intended to do. He could explain it to Irving once they reached the castle.

"Well I don't know how many of us remain but we are happy to help our friends across the lake."

"No!" shouted Cullen coming up behind them. "The mages are dangerous. They shouldn't be allowed to leave the tower."

"Calm yourself, Cullen," warned Gregior.

"But, Knight Commander listen-"

"No! You listen, Cullen," growled Gregior. "We are here to protect the mages not imprison them. If Irving believes they can help then the mages will go, with several templar escorts of course."

"Of course," nodded Irving. "Now child, what was the other reason you returned to the tower?"

"Well, first enchanter," Railan shifted uncomfortable with the weight of his next request, "I know that the mage numbers are depleted currently, but the Grey Wardens need to request their assistance for the Blight. We have the ancient treaties to ask for aide."

"The mages here owe you their lives and we will gladly give the wardens aide, just let us know when you need us."

With that they had one of the treaties fulfilled and headed out of the tower. Railan looked back at the tower that he had once called home. He found it easier to leave this time and watched as Alistair helped the mages into the boats that would cross the lake to face their next demon.


	10. Saving a Child

Railan had been silent the entire trip back to Redcliffe castle. He wasn't looking forward to heading back into the Fade already. He had known that this was the ultimate goal of this excursion to the tower. It was just the idea of the Fade that bothered him currently. After the sloth demon and then what Cullen had said. All of it just bothered him.

When they docked the two boats, Alistair had led the mages up to the castle to begin the preparations.

Railan got out and went quickly to the Chantry to see how the village had held up while they had been gone. Even though it had only been a couple of days it had seemed so much longer to him.

The mayor reported that no walking corpses had come down from the castle, which was good. It meant that the two mages in the castle had been able to keep Conner subdued while they were at the tower.

Railan and Lelianna then made their way up to the Castle. They walked through the quiet courtyard. The castle was so still it seemed as though nothing had changed while they were away. They made their way to the main hall.

"Ah! There you are," the first enchanter exclaimed when he saw Railan. "We can start anytime."

"Let's get this done," Railan sighed.

"I'm glad we decided to take this route," Alistair said reassuringly. "This is really the best option."

Railan couldn't help being worried, but nodded anyway. It really was kind of the almost Templar to reasure him of his decision.

"Very well. I assume you are going into the Fade. Or did you have someone else in mind?" Irving asked.

"I will go. I can't ask anyone else to take the risk." Railan knew anytime in the Fade could be dangerous but he also felt that he needed to prove to Irving that he could handle being a mage. Maybe this could repair some of the damage that the blood mages had caused.

"Let us get under way then."

Raglan felt himself becoming heavy. His eyes fluttering shut and he wondered how many times he would purposely enter the Fade before he would remember to lie down first. He slumped to the floor with a crash as the spell created by the other mages pulled him into the Fade.

When his vision cleared, Railan looked around the Fade realm that he had appeared in. The path seemed oddly straight forward compared to the sloth demon's realm. He walked forward cautiously just in case it was a trap. The path was lined with children's toys, which helped Railan know he was at least in the right place to find Conner.

As he went down a bend in the path he saw Connor up ahead. Railan approached the boy slowly as he did not want to startle him. He had no way of knowing if this was truly Connor or the demon, without speaking to him.

"Who are you?" Connor asked taking a step back from Railan. "Are you the one that made Father ill? Tell me now!"

"No, I wasn't the one who made your Father sick," Railan said calmly. "I'm here to help, but I need to know where the demon is."

"No! You're here to hurt Father! I know it! I won't let you!" he shrieked and the image in front of Railan became the demon.

Railan began casting lightning once he knew that it was the demon. The spell flew from his fingers striking the demon who flew back and disappeared. Railan knew that the demon wasn't gone the Desire Demon would be far more difficult to actually destroy. Railan would have to find a portal in order to move to another part of this Fade realm.

Working his way back up the trail he found a portal near the beginning of the path and slipping into it he felt himself twist and spin. He was spat out the other end of portal.

Again the path was short and straight. Railan was beginning to wonder if some of the simplicity of this realm was Connor trying to help him. Or if nothing else Connor was young and could not create the realm any more complex.

"Why do you keep hurting me? Why are you trying to stop me?"

"Demon, leave this boy. Let me see you as you are."

"You will not find what you seek! Turn back now!" hissed the demon stillin Conner's form.

"Obviously, you are worried that I will find what I seek. Know this when I do I will destroy you demon."

Once again the demon shifted forms from the boy to its natural form. This time the Desire Demon was accompanied by a lesser demon. One quick ice spell stopped the lesser demon but Railan was caught by blast from the Desire demon which threw him to the ground and weakened him. He sent a blast of lightning at it but the electric current was not powerful enough. Railan was on his feet again and dodged the next attack preparing a wizards fire which he blasted at the demon. It vanished again. Sighing Railan began to trudge back up the path to the portal. He had no way of knowing how many timed the demon intended to play this game of cat and mouse.

Before stepping through the portal, Railan stopped and let his mana return to him. The portal was no different this time and no matter how many times he stepped into a portal it always made him feel sick.

He traveled down the path with determination. He could not keep this up forever but neither could the demon.

Again at the end of the path the demon stood in Connor's form.

"Father wanders, seeking me, trapped within my web. All is as it should be. Why do you interfere?"

"Because, demon, you interfere where you should not."

"Connor invited me to come, and we struck a bargain. I have every right to be here and do as he desires," Connor shook his head.

The demon shifted into its form and said, "No, it is time for you to go now. Do not persist, or things will go very badly for you."

The demon vanished without fighting but in its place was three lesser demons. As they slunk towards him he sent a wave of ice which caught two of them freezing them in place. The third neared ready to attack when a wave of fire hit it. The demon shrieked and slumped back into the ground. He quickly threw a fire ball at the two frozen demons blowing them up. Railan turned and ran back up the path. He stepped through the portal all caution tossed aside. He knew that the demon was running but he would catch it.

The portal tossed him out right in front of the demon in its true form. Railan pulled his electrical spells forth. He was ready for the demon to attack but it only raised its hands submissively. Railan kept his magic ready knowing that this could be a trap but he needed to make sure first that Connor would not be hurt.

"Very well. No more illusions," the demon purred. "Now we meet face-to-face. You see my true form and stand in my domain."

"It is just as much a mage's domain as it is yours."

"Possibly, it may just depend on who was here first. It does not matter though. It is here I am most powerful, and yet I have no wish to engage your power. Nor should you be so eager to engage mine." The demon paused as if it was trying to find the proper words before continuing, "Perhaps we should converse instead?"

"What could I possibly have to talk to you about?"

"I possess the boy's soul. We could of course battle for it or we could negotiate like civilized beings." Railan snorted at the idea of the demon being civilized. "If you are smart, you could even come out ahead."

"I don't make deals with demons. Your kind is known for not keeping their side of the bargain."

"Some are like that, but I prefer reasonable negotiation, whenever possible." The demon crossed its arms and looked as though it was frustrated by his stubbornness. "Your goal is for me to release the boy's soul, is that right?"

"Yes, I want the boy to be returned to himself unharmed."

"What if you could…persuade me to leave voluntarily?"

"Why would you do such a thing?

"Let me make a proposition, then. I abandon the boy. At least for now. But I retain the contract he and I made and many years from now I may return and claim what is mine. This will be long after whatever you want is done. In exchange, I will provide something of value to you. Something you desire. Love? A family?" It moved closer to Railan enticingly. "What do you say?"

Railan let lose the lightning ball that had gathered in his hand.

"No! I don't make deals with demons!" Railan shouted.

The demon cast out a blast of fire but Railan was already moving to avoid it. She cackled and said, "That is unlike the rest of your family, but that is something you do not know and may never find out now."

Railan felt his chest contract but kept focused on the fight. For all he knew the demon was just making things up in desperation. He froze her in place and struck out with a blast of fire. When the ice cracked the demon cast a spell upon herself. Railan found himself surrounded by five identical mirrors of the demon. He spun around trying to decide which one was the real one. None of the mirrors attacked, he thought that maybe only the real one could and that would give away the disguise.

He randomly shot an arcane bolt at one of them. The mirror shattered, but the power behind it pulled back to the third mirror which would be the real one. Railan turned slowly trying to look as though he was still confused, while pulling his magic into a large fireball. He let lose the ball at the third of the mirrors. It struck true and the mirrors vanished. The blast threw him back away from the demon but he had been prepared for that and readied for another attack.

With one last blast of lightning, the Desire demon screeched as she vanished from the realm.

Railan awoke and put a hand to his head. As he became aware of his surroundings in the great hall in Redcliffe castle he sensed Alistair close by. He realized the templar was on one knee by his side. When he looked into the almost templar's face he saw real concern there. Alistair had been worried about him while he had been in the Fade.

Alistair reached out a hand to help the mage sit up. For just coming out of the Fade, Railan was doing surprisingly well. Maybe he was getting used to going and fighting in the other world, which seemed like a scary thought to him.

"The demon is gone," Railan said reassuringly.

At the news Isolde and Teagan rushed down the hallway and up stairs to the bedrooms to check on Conner and Eamon.

Alistair looked at Railan, and he nodded signaling that he should go after them. Alistair disappeared in the same direction the others had moments before.

Railan slowly got to his feet the queasiness from returning from the Fade dissipating.

"Thank you for your help Irving," Railan said.

The first enchanter nodded, "It was the least we could do."


	11. His story

The party members in the castle worked their way down to the village to meet up with Sten and Lodan. They then started on their way towards Denerim in order to find Brother Genitivi and clues to where the ashes might be to heal Arl Eamon. Railan wasn't certain they would actually find the ashes and this could just be a wild goose chase, but he was willing to try at least for Alistair's sake.

When they reached the river they decided to stop for the day and set up camp. They had found a large field that was clear of darkspawn and would allow them to have a relatively quiet evening, which they would all be grateful for.

That evening Railan sat by the bank of the river, his head resting on his knees. The river churned in front of him and the cool breeze coming off of the river made him shudder. The last week weighed heavily on him and right now he wasn't sure how he could continue on with their mission. He felt like his heart had been ripped out of his chest and been gnawed on by darkspawn. He squeezed his eyes shut as another sob ripped through him with a shake.

The mage heard footsteps behind him but was to the point that he did not care. Tears streaked down his cheeks and yet he couldn't bring himself to care who saw. He knew it made him look weak but right now, he felt weak. Weak and young; in most cases it would have been at least five years after his harrowing till they would have had him leave the tower and even then it would be escorted by a half dozen Templars. No one here seemed to notice or care that he was young as long as he made the important decisions that they didn't want to make.

Someone quietly sat down beside Railan, but he kept his eyes shut. He did not want to see anyone right now; he just could not find his voice to tell the person to leave. They sat in the quiet of nature for some time. Time mattered very little to the mage at this point.

"I am so sorry," Alistair whispered, finally breaking the silence.

"Alistair, you really need to stop apologizing," Railan snorted, as he remembered how many timed before that the almost templar said those very same words.

"Okay, then let me thank you. You went out of your way to save Eamon's family, and you didn't have to, but you did anyway. I really appreciate it, thank y-."

"It's alright Alistair," Railan interrupted. "I just…I can't…I don't know." He let out a breath and with it another sob.

Railan felt Alistair put a hand on his shoulder. He knew the other man was trying to console him but part of him did not want to be consoled. That part of him felt he deserved every bit of pain that came with what had happened.

"Don't," the mage said harshly. With a sigh he frowned; he had no right to snap at the warrior. Truly he had only himself to blame for where he was right now. Trying again he began softer, "Alistair." Railan paused and took a couple of deep breaths trying to calm down and lifted his head. "Thank you. You've been so great; I do not know how I would have made it through everything without you."

"You are welcome," Alistair said, his confusion clear in his voice, "but I have not done anything to deserve your thanks. I just tend to follow you around."

"No you do far more than that," Railan smiled at the warrior. The mage let out another sigh before he spoke again, "When Duncan took me from the tower, I was so afraid. I was scared that I would do something wrong and I would hurt someone. Then I met you, and I know most mages wouldn't agree with me but it has helped having a templar around." He put up his hand to stop Alistair when he opened his mouth to interrupt. "I know, I know, you never took your vows but at least if something happened to me or if I lost control I know you could stop me."

"Hmm, I guess that makes sense. I always wondered why you were alright with me when most other mages disliked my background," Alistair chuckled softly.

"I've never had a problem with the templars; if anything I've always felt safer around them. I have always been in fear of losing control of my abilities," Railan sighed and realized that there were tears in his eyes again. He knew this wouldn't be easy but he had to get through it. "I don't think anyone had a chance to tell you about my past before we left Ostegar."

Railan stared out at nothing his eyes foggy in memories when he began, "I was taken to the tower sixteen years ago. They thought I was maybe three or four years old at the time but I have no memories of any time before then. I just know that I woke up in the tower and was told I would be safe. No one there knew my name; they gave me some time but I never knew what name I had before. The templar who brought me there named me Railan. I was never told what happened and maybe no one knew exactly what happened; however, there were always rumors and whispers from mages and templars alike. The most I ever figured out was that when they found me the village I was in had been completely destroyed, and everyone was dead except for me. There were signs of magical use and the veil was torn. Luckily there were no demons around. Under normal circumstances the templars would have just killed me on sight but the one who found me stepped in preventing them from killing a child. He took me to the tower so that I could be trained." The weight lifted off his shoulders as the words tumbled out of his mouth. Railan frowned and furrowed his brow, "I wish I could remember his name." He let out another sigh, "So that's why I tend to be afraid of my own abilities and because of that templars make me feel safer."

Railan smiled softly and winked at Alistair. He was pleasantly surprised when the other man blushed. He brushed the tears from his cheeks and knew that he really needed to tell Alistair the rest of his story. He owed the almost templar that much.

"Thank you," Railan looked down at the water as it flowed past. "This past week has been the hardest that I've ever had. And I know you would haven't asked but you deserve to have answers."

Railan hunched forward wrapping his arms around his knees; he stared at nothing in particular. "What you saw between me and Jowan in the dungeon was only a part of what was going on between the two of us. During the sixteen years I was in the tower, I had very few close friends. I had always been quiet, being afraid of what one is capable of can cause that," he smirked at the words he used having been told that same thing by the elder mages regularly. "Jowan and I were more than just friends though. I loved him and at one point I would have said that he loved me too."

Railan didn't expect this news to be a surprise since Alistair had seen their performance in the dungeon. He glanced at Alistair out of the corner of his eye trying to gauge the templar's reaction to what he was hearing. He could not tell if it was concern or confusion on the other's face. I will have to clarify for the little chantry boy, he thought to himself.

"We had been lovers for several years, when he came to me one day and said he was in love with a woman. Part of me had thought that he had made her up, especially when he continued to come to me some nights. I knew that the other nights he was spending with her. I became even more reclusive. No one really noticed, except for one templar, Cullen. He was very kind and let me talk about my problems with him." Railan smiled sadly at the memories, "There are times you remind me of him."

"Cullen? He was the one we met at the tower?" Alistair asked skeptically.

"Yes, although I would not say that he was the same person I knew before. An ordeal like that changes a person; I cannot even fathom what he had to endure on top of watching everyone he knew fall. But back when the tower was home, he had been one of the nicest templars there."

"Then came the day that I was summoned for my Harrowing. I had been nervous not because of the test, I knew I could face whatever they threw at me but I was worried about losing control. Cullen had been the templar chosen to strike me down if something went wrong and I trusted him completely. Afterward he stopped me and praised me for how well I had done. I think a piece of me loved him, even though I knew nothing could ever happen but he was one of the few people in the tower who showed me genuine compassion. I never knew that he had shared those feelings for me till we were at the tower, but still he was a good templar and would never have let anything happen between us."

"However, after speaking with him, Jowan came to me and asked for a favor. That was when he introduced me to Lilly; she was a sister in the tower. She had found out that they had intended to make Jowan tranquil. They asked for my help to flee the tower, and even though I knew I should not, I helped them. We were caught leaving the basement after destroying his phylactery. That was when Lilly and I found out that Jowan used blood magic," Railan swallowed hard, he felt Jowan's betrayal threatened to drown him once again. Tears stung his eyes and he blinked them back so he could finish.

"I can understand why some mages turn to blood magic. They are usually the ones who hate the templars as much as some templars hate mages. Blood magic is the only magic that is truly free from templar control. For now at least till someone figures out a way to stop that too. Templars hadn't always had the abilities that they do today. Necessity to control mages led to developing those talents. But now I've sidetracked from what had happened at the tower.

"Jowan used the blood magic to knock back the templars and he ran. The templars took Lilly to Aonar, probably would have taken me there as well if Duncan had not stepped in. He actually had to conscript me, because I fought the idea of leaving templar control. I knew the alternative was imprisonment or death but either of those seemed safer in my mind. I told Duncan that the first night when we camped, and I told him of the stories of how the templars had found me. You know what his response was?" Railan turned his head to actually look at Alistair, and saw him shake his head slightly. "'I trust you,' was all he said. I remember I whispered, 'Why should you? I do not even trust me.' I did not sleep at all that night for fear that I would not be able to hold off the demons that night without having a templar nearby."

"So that's my story, I am sorry; I should have told you sooner. An unstable mage is never a good thing, and you should have known how much I depend on you to stop me if I ever lose control."

Railan felt Alistair put his arm around his shoulder, and he let himself lean into the embrace resting his head on the templar's shoulder. The tears he had fought back slipping down his cheeks his emotions flooding because of the kind gesture by the other man.

"Thank you," Railan whispered once his sobs stopped shaking through him. "You really are an amazing friend."

"I'll always be here for you, Rain," Alistair whispered in return.

The two men sat there till Railan was able to stop crying. Railan again watched the almost templar before he smiled at the other man. For the first time in the last week he felt safe. He knew that if there was a problem Alistair at least knew what he was expected to do; the weight of his past no longer the heavy burden on his shoulders.


End file.
